Friday, November 27, 2009

Voicemail Theater

The following 1 act play was left on my office voicemail this morning.

Female voice: "It says he's closed today."

Male voice: "Closed? Today?"

Female voice: "Yes. Closed. Today."

Male voice: "Why the fuck would he be closed?!"

Female voice: "It doesn't say. A lot of places are closed today. It's sort of a holiday."

Male voice: "That's bullshit. He should know better. What if a patient needs him?"

Female voice: "I can leave a message."

Male voice: "Yeah, but do we want him to call us back?"

Female voice: "It says he will."

Male voice: "I don't want him to. It's just not right that he's closed today."

Female voice: "Okay, what do you want me to do?"

Male voice: "Let's see if we can find another neurologist, with the decency to be open when patients need him."

(click).

17 comments:

Stephanie said...

Encore! Encore!

Phillip said...

One thing I decided to try to do was to be more active in commenting on blogs I enjoy, and perhaps re-start my old blogging ways ...

Then this comes along.

And, like a diamond, renders me speechless.

Search Google images for "picard facepalm" to get a sense of what this makes me do/think/feel ...

Dr. Trout said...

You just dodged a bullet, brother. Good riddance.

Helen said...

For your readers' sakes, I hope they don't find another neurologist.

Hope you had a great Thanksgiving.

Doctor D said...

Seriously Grumpy? You don't stay in your office 24/7? WTF? This guy might need you!

How dare you take time away from your office? Are you putting your wife and kids before this patient and his needs? How selfish!

Obviously this guy's family doesn't want him around on a holiday weekend. He just needed a little grumpy-love to brighten his holidays.

Thanks for the great story. I'm sure I'll be seeing this dude in the ER shortly.

erichollins said...

Would it be polite to ask whether the voices sounded like they were American or not? I'm wondering because my grandma used to work for a Korean dentist that was always open on July 4th, Labor Day, and Memorial Day.

Grumpy, M.D. said...

ERichollins- generic American voices.

Anonymous said...

Betcha a buck against a day-old cruller it was Mr. Jackass.

minimedic said...

Correct me if I'm wrong, but I'm sure you have a message on that automatic answering-thingie that says "If the shit is hitting the fan, please call 911..."

I can understand needing to see a PCP in the morning for a sudden-onset illness or minor injury, but a neurologist?

The Mother said...

I'm betting they don't find a neurologist decent enough to be open on Black Friday.

Jacqueline said...

Damn!

Anonymous said...

Holy funny! I work as a switchboard operator for one of the "World renowned" US Hospital and Clinics..I'm glad to see we are not the only ones that keep track of the goofballs...One day I'm writin a book! thanks for the chuckle from the other side!

Lenore said...

You got that, Grumpy? The decency...THE DECENCY!!!!

Anonymous said...

"What about the children?!?" Don't you care? I might have a hangnail emergency or something!
The "children" comment always seems to appear in any emergency explaining the heartlessness and cruelty of people.

Anonymous said...

Awesome. I got one of those two from my MIL saying the message says to leave a message and we'd call back, so she went on for a good 3 or 4 minutes to my FIL about how she didn't want to leave a message. All the while, leaving us a message...

student dr. blaze said...

I'm beginning to think we should have more days when everything is closed. It would cut away at this insane American concept that we should be able to access anyone/anything we want at any time. The sense of entitlement of people like this is revolting. I hope for your sake that he had to wait 10 hours in the ED to get his prescription refill (or whatever other mundane request he probably wanted). Sheesh.

John Woolman said...

I think you secret is out and someone was trying to wind you up.....

 
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