Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Marital status

Like other doctors' offices, my patient information form features the typical questions, including "Marital Status?"

Usually someone writes something simple, like "married", "single", "divorced", "widowed". Or even just letters like M, S, D, or W.

But some people feel the need to make this a bit more personal.

I've actually seen the following:

"Single, and desperate."

"Divorced x 3, widowed x 2, separated x 2."

"Married, but it's an open marriage."

"Married, and hate the bitch."

"Single, but I sleep with my boyfriend."

"Single. Is Mary available?"

"Single. My phone number is below, please call if interested."

21 comments:

Anonymous said...

Wow. I've never considered using my doctor's office as a potential dating pool. My cardiologist is one of the most attractive men I've ever seen...

Doris said...

Well, IS Mary available?

>:p

Grumpy, M.D. said...

The lady says she is spoken for!

Sarah Brown said...

I have patients write "not enough" under the blank for sex. So sophmoric.

Julie said...

i like the phone number one ...

WarmSocks said...

So much for open-ended questions. That question is begging to be multiple-choice!

donna said...

LMAO!! Oh again you need to pay for repairs to PC as there is now
coffee on it...hahaha :o

It never accured to me that there
was more beyond the supply of d.s...etc! At least it gets the
day going!

carla said...

Well, you can't say your patients aren't honest!

Anonymous said...

have you ever seen someone just leaves it blank?

SuFu said...

The last one same patient as http://erstories.net/archives/3398 ?

Merry said...

Why do doctors ask that question? Does my marital status affect the doctor's diagnosis?

Grumpy, M.D. said...

1. Medical view- it helps us know what else is going on in your life,
and how that may (or may not) pertain to your current problem.

2. Insurance- you may be on the insurance of a spouse or SO.

pharmacy chick said...

Nice! Mary must be a hottie! Happy new year Grumpy! Funny, nobody ever asks about MY marital status..must be something about the white coat that scares people away!

Anonymous said...

I once had a patient(who is an attorney BIGG SHOCK) who next to marital status said "partnered this is 2010 you should have partner on your form by now, next time I come in I will check to see if you have updated your paperwork."

The Mother said...

Obviously we need to update all of our standards. Perhaps even gender--M, F, T, B, and Q instead of the usual two.

Lil Suthern Medic said...

LMAO. Reminds me of the PPCRs are we use. Does this fall into the same category? When checking gender, these are our options:
1 Male
2 Female
3 Unknown
4 None

:)

23 Skidoo said...

When there is a free text field for "Race", I always put: Triathlon. It usually raises a few eyebrows but I refuse to change it. :)

A Doc 2 Be said...

I never thought of using a doc's office for dating pool either - I shall start promptly!!

LOL - know any single, 45+ MALE docs ??? :P

Immahottietoo (hahaha)

It can be a WHOLE new calling for you Dr. G: neurology thingy, comic, and dating doc ... think of the book titles, the speeches, the YouTubes...

ERP said...

Married, but I'd love to have an affair with a rich, hot doctor.

Sherry said...

I once wrote "happily divorced" when I changed doctors right after I got my papers saying I had lost 170 pounds of dead weight.

mcgee said...

I must confess, I have done some creative form filling in the past. When I went to a new ortho doc, I not only had to send all my medical records, xrays, MRIs, yadda yadda, I also had to fill out about 20 pages of questionaires. One form wanted a one page, detailed description--in my own hand writing--of how I injured my knee, to include "who, what, where, when and how". I was a little punchy by then so I had some fun with it. I don't know if the doctor actually read it, but his nurse thought it was pretty damn funny--especially the part at the end where I said that filling out all the forms had given me tendonitis.

 
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