Thursday, December 16, 2010

Wednesday afternoon rounds

Dr. Testosterone: "You paged me?"

Dr. Grumpy: "Yeah, I saw Mr. Trauma, who you consulted me on, and I'm just trying to get an idea of why you called me."

Dr. Testosterone: "Which patient was this?"

Dr. Grumpy: "He was riding his bike and was hit by a drunk driver, and suffered multiple fractures."

Dr.Testosterone: "Oh, yeah. I want your input as to why he fell off the bike. Did he have a seizure, or balance problem, or something like that?"

Dr. Grumpy: "Uhh... Your dictation says he fell off because he was hit by a car!"

Dr. Testosterone: "So? My dictation doesn't mean anything."

25 comments:

Humincat said...

Car shmar, you need to find out what REALLY happened!

Just Thelma said...

Wha...??? This one has rendered me speechless!

Julie said...

and you only drink diet coke ... your life would have me reaching for the stronger stuff

legalalien said...

He must have been the inspiration for the Orthopaedics vs anaesthetist video!

Anonymous said...

Maybe he meant evaluate the driver of the car by talking to the patient?

Anonymous said...

I am a bicyclist, I ride a couple of thousand miles per year. Dr. You can tell him that you spoke with an expert. My opinion is that it is hard to remain upright after being hit by a car. Bill accordingly.

mcgee said...

Sounds like Dr. T is working for the drunk driver's insurance company.

C said...

Smile and nod, smile and nod.

Dr. Testes is a dingbat, that is my professional Mommy opinion.

Azuka said...

Of course it was a balance problem.

Not House said...

There is a fracture; I have to fix it.

Heh

CrownedwithVictory said...

This case looks like it needs to be studied and presented to a medical journal.

Anonymous said...

I would have to concur with the anonymous bicyclist and CrownedwithVictory. I think they have hit the proverbial nail on the head. My unprofessional opinion is that Mr. Testosterone needs to study and publish this case on a Medical Journal.

MedicMatthew said...

What is the definition of a double blind study?

Two orthopedists looking at an EKG.



What is the orthopedists definition of the heart?

An organ that pumps ancef to the bones.

Moose said...

Space aliens.

Always blame the space aliens.

Anonymous said...

Wait a second, Wednesday afternoon rounds. Isn't Wednesday the day that Doctors traditionally ride their bicycles or play golf . I knew there was something wrong here.

Grumpy, M.D. said...

I don't golf.

Except on the courses with little windmills.

Anonymous said...

I once got a wrist injury as a result of being bucked off a horse. It offended me highly that numerous medical documents recorded that I had sustained the injury in a fall from a horse. I didn't FALL, dammit, I was BUCKED!!

Anonymous said...

1442- do you have a seizure disorder or a balance problem?

The Mother said...

What happened first?

Did the patient get fat and then have heart problems, or does he have heart problems and then get fat from lack of exercise?

Or did he get hit by a car?

Tough to figure out sometimes. And even then, post hoc does not equal propter hoc.

Anonymous said...

As a medical transcriptionist for over 22 years, I'm just glad he didn't blame his meaningless dictation on the MT who transcribed his report. If it doesn't look right, many docs blame it on the MT, not the person who actually dictated the report in the first place. Sheesh.

terri c said...

At least this idiot doc is honest. I've seen a lot of dictation that doesn't mean anything. Poor patient. He probably has a balance problem NOW what with the fractures and all.

ndenunz said...

How do you hide a dollar bill from an orthopod?


Put it in the chart.

Kat's Kats said...

After conferring with other specialists on this list, we have determined that the referring physician has third column, second row. As for the patient, they were hit by a car. Please care for each accordingly. Specialist to whom patient was referred should consume vast amounts of diet coke.

ERP said...

Hmmm. I assume you ordered an MRI and EEG monitoring?

Kat's Kats said...

@Anonymous 1442 - Rather like my husband who, when going in to have his boxer's break treated, put down the truth of how he received it. "Punched dumb-*ss brother." His orthopod has known my husband for some time (diabetic w/trigger finger operations) and they all fell over laughing. In particular the specialist who went to school with said brother.

@ERP - Do you really think that the MRI & EEG will show up anything on the referring physician?? Oh dear, that was my out loud type again, wasn't it.

 
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