Saturday, May 15, 2010

Friday night, 10:57 p.m.

"Hello, I'm calling for the MRI-scheduling lady for Dr. Grumpy. You left me a message that my MRI is on May 21, and that is, like, my birthday, and I'm real claustrophobic and need sedation for my MRI so I don't, like, freak-out or shit like that, so I can't have it on my birthday because I always spend my birthday driving around to my friends' places and smoking pot with them, so I can't be sedated on that day because then the drugs to help me have the MRI would make me too sleepy to drive, and that's not safe."

21 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'ld say she doesn't need an MRI then.

Jackie said...

...

*blink*

...

DreamingTree said...

She should just smoke pot with her friends BEFORE the MRI. Problem solved. Uh...unless it makes her paranoid...and she gets the munchies... Scratch that idea.

Kate said...

Now this? This one takes the cake! Wahoo!

The Machinist's Wife said...

Unreal man. Unreal.

Anonymous said...

Now I know you're in California.

Gen said...

This truly is an unusual patient for Doctor Grumpy. She actually listened to a message and is responding in a timely manner!!!

Da Blog said...

I think it was The Dilbert Principle that said there is nothing more dangerous than a resourceful idiot.

Ari said...

Points for honesty.

Lo said...

Amazing, but not illogical. The patient seems to still have a functioning brain, in spite of possible drug overuse.

However, why did your readers assume the patient was female? Did I miss something?
Love you Dr. G.

Anonymous said...

all the good calls come after 5pm on friday

Kat's Kats said...

LOL!! Okay, now I'm ready for my Personal Torture... ummm... ah... oh... I mean Physical Therapy!!

BTW I had my second knee surgery on my bday and my third the day before! My surgeon told me to consider them presents. huh. But I didn't ask to change the dates!

ACZ said...

Well, at least the patient has their priorities straight!

I guess discretion has gone by the wayside along with just about every other construct of civilization.

@Anon 8:50 - Very Funny!!!
Makes me pine for the Golden State!

"Dude, like, man, I drop acid at Timothy Leary's grave every year on my birthday - or like, some graveyard somewhere, so, like, in addition to communing with my spiritual shaman, I, like, think that being in a closed air MRI would, like, freak the living shit out of me!!! Like, I'd probablly be trippin' that I was dead, or some shit, or like, even worse, I'd been buried alive. Whoa, bummer dude! I'm startin' to freak out right now, just thinkin' about it! Yeah, we'd better push that MRI back by at least a week, dude.

Dr. Tonya said...

Well...to try and put a positive spin on things...

At least she planned on going in for her MRI instead of calling your office asking for results to an MRI she never went to in the first place?

*Sigh* Sorry, I tried.

RehabNurse said...

Doc,

I believe you...I have patients that tell me they smoke weed. Not always right away, mind you, but usually they do before I'm done (usually on admission, when we specifically ask).

The Evil Receptionist said...

The logic of this one is more astounding the the average Dr. Grumpy patient.

Anonymous said...

what the....O.K. that just boggled even me. If I were concerned enough about my health to have an MRI, I would be rethinking the pot. Just sayin...

Melissa

Val said...

That's just astonishingly stupid!!

Anonymous said...

Really? Here in Colorado you can get your medical marijuana license based on seizures alone; that is one of the things they will prescribe for...I'm taking advantage of this.

Anonymous said...

OK, folks, I can't be the only one. We had rules back in the day. Never go to work stoned, of course. Always know your source or know someone you trust who has sampled the product before you do so. Stay at home when under the infuence. When using something that makes communication with people not like us difficult, always arrange for a friend not sharing the experience to be available by phone in case of emergency. We lost one person to alcohol abuse along the way but the rest of us have had successful careers since back in the day. The lesson? Once a rule follower, always a rule follower.

C. said...

Okay, I think this is embarrassing for the rest of us with May 21 birthdays!

 
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