Pete: "You're pretty optimistic. I'm 92."
Tuesday, May 15, 2012
Great patient moments
Pete: "You're pretty optimistic. I'm 92."
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Dr. Grumpy: "Pete, I want to see you back in 3 months."
Pete: "You're pretty optimistic. I'm 92."
A Blog detailing the insanity of my medical practice and the stupidity of everyday life.
Pete: "You're pretty optimistic. I'm 92."
Welcome to my whining!
This blog is entirely for entertainment purposes. All posts about patients, or my everyday life, or anything else may be fictional, or be my experience, or were submitted by a reader, or any combination of the above. Factual statements may or may not be accurate. I could be making all this up. I may not even be a doctor. The only true statement on here is that I probably drink more Diet Coke than you do. A lot more.
Singing Foo!
Singing Foo!
Twitter fans- you can follow me @docgrumpy
Cast of Characters:
Annie: My Phenomenal MA
Mary: My Awesome Secretary
Ed: The office fish
Dr. Pissy: The guy I share an office with
Mrs. Grumpy: My Boss (also the world's greatest school nurse)
Frank, Craig, and Marie: The Grumpy Tribe
Garlic and Riley: The Grumpy Dogs
Questions? Comments? Biting sarcasm? Write to: pagingdrgrumpy [at] gmail [dot] com
Note: I do not answer medical questions. If you are having a medical issue, see your own doctor. For all you know I'm really a Mongolian yak herder and have no medical training at all except in issues regarding the care and feeding of Mongolian yaks.
Cast of Characters:
Annie: My Phenomenal MA
Mary: My Awesome Secretary
Ed: The office fish
Dr. Pissy: The guy I share an office with
Mrs. Grumpy: My Boss (also the world's greatest school nurse)
Frank, Craig, and Marie: The Grumpy Tribe
Garlic and Riley: The Grumpy Dogs
Questions? Comments? Biting sarcasm? Write to: pagingdrgrumpy [at] gmail [dot] com
Note: I do not answer medical questions. If you are having a medical issue, see your own doctor. For all you know I'm really a Mongolian yak herder and have no medical training at all except in issues regarding the care and feeding of Mongolian yaks.
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2012
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May
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- Negotiations
- Dear Groupon,
- Lions and peacocks and needles OH MY!
- FORE!
- Memorial Day reruns
- Random Sunday pictures
- Memories...
- Eloquence
- Some things just go great together
- The bag lady
- Huh?
- Zoo. To go.
- Monday with Mary's voice mail
- We're talking serious Haldol. And 4-point leathers
- More hairs leap off
- Irony
- Saturday
- Mary's Desk
- Thursday evening rambling
- Wednesday night, 11:23 p.m.
- Speeding. Drunk Driving. Racing through a construc...
- Huh?
- Great patient moments
- Pay-up!
- Holy interpreter, Batman!
- Weekend reruns
- Found at a freakin' dollar store!
- Memories...
- Descriptive speech
- AYFKM
- Driving home from school
- Oh, I think you do
- Yogurt. And nuts.
- Weekend reruns, part 2
- Weekend reruns, part 1
- Thursday afternoon
- Computers: letting you practice without a brain
- Great names
- Have you considered earplugs?
- Today's lesson: Never leave the patient alone.
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May
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20 comments:
Haha! I would love to shake this guy's hand.
Love it!
Great patient! When my grandmother was 96, she told the opthamalogist if she lived to 100, he could do her cataract surgery THEN. Of course, when she had a lumpectomy at 86, her question to the surgeon was "How long until I can have a drink?" He gave her a bottle of Dewar's at her post-op checkup.
Funeral. Cemetary.
stranger: who was it?
mourner: my husband.
stranger: how old was he?
mourner: 97
stranger: and whatchagonnado now?
mourner: going home
stranger: how old are you?
mourner: 88
stranger: is there any use going home?
My grandmother died at 89. For the past 6 or 7 years she had been saying "No" when the cardio wanted to do valve replacement surgery. She rendered him speechless when she said, "I think I am too old for a grand opening."
I hope I am as witty as this generation if I reach that age!
My mother who is 92, told me matter of factly that for some reason she just started to fall apart this last year. Then she laughed at the comedy of her comment.
Love it! Wish I could meet this patient :)
hope someone gave Pete pie and a hug-
I love Pete!!
I like this Pete.
I identify with Pete.
At my age, a "life-time guarantee" is not as big a deal as it once was.
Gawd, he totally hates my comments, he hates me, he hates me. I'm tellin' you, he hates me.
With that kind of sense of humor... that guy has plenty of years worth of yelling at kids from his porch left!!
"Anonymous said...
Gawd, he totally hates my comments, he hates me, he hates me. I'm tellin' you, he hates me."
Hoo boy. You have quite the groupie squad growing, Dr G.
You're totally turning into the new Dr Crippen.
Your patients are so much funnier than our patients.
we used to say- no lp records, no radial tires, do not start war and peace. recently had a lady with controlled metastatic cancer whom i told to come back in september. she sadly glared till i changed it to june.
Does he buy green bananas?
In my line of works it's "Don't buy the big bag of dog food."
I love Pete also.
This reminds me of a not so great patient moment.
She is actually one of my favorite patients which made it all the worse. She was finished with the doctor and came to me to check out. She didn't have any special follow up orders so after some small talk I said "looks like you're good to go, he just wants to see you back in 4 months".
Her son, who has proven himself a total ass many times in the past, was standing directly beside her and said "That won't be necessary, you DO know she's 87 don't you?". I was so thoroughly disgusted I'm pretty sure my face literally turned red with anger and I am very proud of my self restraint in that I did not physically attack him. I looked over at this sweet old woman and she was just looking at the floor.
I then addressed her and asked if she wanted to arrange her next appointment and she shook her head no, still not looking up at anyone.
She hasn't been in to see us since then but I call to check on her when I can and the last time I did I'm happy to report that she was totally on point with everything... doing housework, preparing to receive guests, doing perfectly fine.
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