Friday, September 12, 2014

In that case, I think you're publishable

Patient quote of the day:

"I'm allergic to all known amino acids and proteins."

29 comments:

Steve Parker, M.D. said...

"I'll add that to the list of 18 drugs you're allergic to. And please find another doctor to replace me in the next 30 days."

Pierre said...

So, you treat already dead patients :-)

Packer said...

Another case of "Allergy Envy" gone mad. The "Allergy Moms" must be stopped. Next, They will be banning amino acids and proteins from the schools. It starts with peanuts,cereal, raisins, apples, bananas, oranges, ice cream, birthday cakes, cupcakes, chocolate, wool, cotton, glutten, perfumes, and ends with amino acids and proteins. Mark my words.

stacey said...

And that's why, just a little bit of science... is such a bad thing.

Anonymous said...

Just rememer that if you try to explain why she is not it will certainly affect your patient satisfaction scrores in a most negative way.

HDJ said...

Is it contagious?

Anonymous said...

"And now, Doc, I'd like to go through this stack of articles I downloaded off the Internet."

Shellye said...

I'm allergic to a lot of medications, but I've never heard of anyone being allergic to all proteins and amino acids. The human body contains proteins and amino acids. How can someone be allergic to them?

Rita said...

Is Dr. Grumpy qualified to treat silicon based life forms?

Anonymous said...

There's no more space on the allergy list. Did you mention an allergy to oxygen, carbon, and nitrogen as well? Let's just say you reside in an airtight mausoleum existing in memory and forever on the silver screen.

Anonymous said...

@ Shellye - it's called autoamino disease.

Anonymous said...

Sounds like an allergy to cognizance to me

Avicile Mohaili said...

I'm really interested in their diet now!

clairesmum said...

is this syndrome best treated with the placebo class of medications?

Anonymous said...

Dr. FOS: He's crashing!
Nurse: What do we do Doctor?!
Dr. FOS: I have no choice. I'm going
to push the placebo in and see if
it helps.
...seconds later, the patient makes a full recovery!
Dr. FOS: A textbook case of autoamino disease.

Anonymous said...

A nice long vaca with the family, only to come home to .... this. Have you stopped banging your head against the wall yet?

Anonymous said...

well . . . . the mirror-image Spock in James Blish's novel "Spock Must Die!" had to synthesize levo-rotary amino acids . . . but I wouldn't call that an allergy . . .

Anonymous said...

"If it weren't for Arby's, I don't know what I'd do."

Anonymous said...

Hey, wait a minute there whippersnapper, are you allergic to the essential ones or those other ones? Because, there's only one in a million chance of encountering those rare and elusive amino acids found only in moondust. Just so long as you don't plan to have children...

Loren Pechtel said...

The normal thing to be allergic to is protein. You can't be allergic to amino acids, though.

Anonymous said...

Thank you all for adding some needed laughter to my day.
You folks are better than
the comedy writers for TV.

08armydoc said...

"I'm allergic to epinephrine"
A, um, no you're not
B, stfu

"Im allergic to antihistamines"
Yeeeaaah, can you please stop talking now?

Anonymous said...

And people wonder why doctors need vacations...

cliffintokyo said...

Really! I'm allergic to people who use scientific terms without having a clue what they mean.
Go and see Dr. Quack and ask him for some protein global apoptosis promotor.

Anonymous said...

On an unrelated note, I would like to pass on some "words of wisdom"
to all who read this: In life,
tread lightly. If you can't though, don't leave any footprints. And for
God's sake, don't touch anything!!

Anonymous said...

Yayyyy. Another one for an all carbs diet, Gumby.

Anonymous said...

Make mine a straight vodka with a little wallpaper paste on the side.

bobbie said...

To 08armydoc ~

I actually once had a patient tell me he was allergic to epi. S/S? "It makes my hart race."

BelgiumDoc said...

I always knew some Americans are composed entirely of lipids.

 
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