I knew the call would take a while, so stopped in the bathroom, then walked to my home office, flipped on my computer, and opened the patient's chart. This took maybe 5 minutes from the original message.
Then I dialed him up.
Dr. Grumpy: "This is Dr. Grumpy, returning a call."
Mr. Etiquette: "Um, huh, oh."
Dr. Grumpy: "You called me?"
Mr. Etiquette: "Man, you just woke me up."
Dr. Grumpy: "Sorry. What can I do for you?"
Mr. Etiquette: "Took you long enough to call back, and I dozed off again. I can't believe you woke me up."
Dr. Grumpy: "Well, in your call you said..."
Mr. Etiquette: "That doesn't matter. I can't believe you woke me up. This is incredibly rude."