Saturday, September 17, 2011

Memories...

Like most residents, I moonlighted in various ER's and urgent cares around town.

One night I saw a guy in SERIOUS pain.

He was at Local Grocery, buying a can of soup.

When the pretty teenage girl cashier asked "Anything else you need?" He said "How about this, sweetie?" whipped his winkie out, and laid it on the checkout counter.

The cashier grabbed the soup can and smashed him flat.

The urologist I paged was laughing so hard that he had to hang up and call me back when he'd stopped.

41 comments:

Lynda Halliger-Otvos said...

Reaction times like hers should be encouraged. i bet it was a long time be4 he pulled that damn thing out again. I would have fallen over laughing too. thanks for this early morning chuckle. Fwd’d to all my nursing friends.

bobbie said...

Way to go, cashier!!!

Anonymous said...

That girl is my hero.

Ólafur Pálsson said...

Hahahaha I nearly fell off my chair xD

Thatgirl said...

That girl has amazing reflexes! I wonder if the guy ended up having to register as a sex offender...

My freshman year of college (I was 17) I worked the night drive thru at a Hardees and one Friday night a guy came through without pants on. I dumped his iced tea in his lap and he drove off. Afterwards I was kicking myself for not getting his license plate number.

beercan43 said...

OUCH !!!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

I thought that was an "urban legend"?

Grumpy, M.D. said...

I saw it myself. It wasn't pretty. Big and purple.

Anonymous said...

A relative to Lorena Bobbit?

Anonymous said...

It is refreshing to hear about someone getting what they deserve...

John Woolman said...

I have to wonder what a diligent prosecutor might do if the man had complained. One might hope that prosecutorial discretion would be exercised. Anyone taking bets though?

Anonymous said...

Yea cashier!
Saw more than my share of unwanted weenies working the 11 p.m. to 7 a.m. shift at a convenience store eons ago. I started putting out coffee and home-made cookies free to any uniformed public servant who stopped in. I did not care if you were the school janitor. If you wore some sort of uniform, you got coffee and cookies.

Coffee and pastry? Cop magnet

Weenie wiggler walked in and was showing off his wares when two law enforcement officers walked in. I did my best early 20's "Help me!" look and the two nice LEOs gave the Wiggler what for. And a trip to the station. And charges. Etc.

Aggggggh. Guys, hire a professional. It's cheaper in the long run.

Dr. G, I would like to have been the coder doing that admit! And the urologist had it right, laughter wAS the best medicine.

C. said...

Were you in ny? Happends a lot

Ole Phat Stu said...

He went off half cock, maybe?

Old MD Girl said...

Go her!

Claude said...

Someone did that to me once, when I was in my 40s. Being a bit older, (and having seen many in my nursing work), it didn't fluster me at all. I just laughed, clapped hands, and enquired, "Do you have only one?" He actually put it back in, and rushed away.

Anonymous said...

In the service if you got the "clap" you would meet a medic with a rubber mallet.


w: fladatio (synchronicity)

Loren Pechtel said...

I'm afraid I have to agree with John Woolman. Her actions far exceed the threat. No image justifies inflicting injuries that require medical attention and it's not like he was actually going to do anything more than that.

I suspect it comes down to a matter of a jury not being willing to convict in a case like this.

Mockingbird said...

Was the soup Bean with Bacon?

Anonymous said...

Assault with a dead weapon.

wellillbe said...

In response to Loren. Showing your penis to someone not wanting to see it is sexual harrassment and should not be tolerated. SHe had no idea what he would do next. Its self defense and the jerk deserved it. top it at harrassment you may prevent an assult.

Moose said...

Mockingbird -- perhaps it wasn't really soup, but a can of "Beanie Weenie."

Dr G -- It eternally boggles my mind that a grown person with children who went to medical school is reluctant to use the word PENIS.

And with that, I will continue laughing my head off.

SarahRx said...

This reminds me of a story my mother once told me. She was in university at the time and was walking, late at night, home with a friend (another female) when they were flashed. My mom was too shocked to even react but her friend just looked him up and down and said "I've seen better". The flasher slunk away and they continued on their way.

I'm not sure what kind of reaction people like that are hoping for, but I'm pretty sure that unimpressed is not it.

Tee said...

Serves him right! I hope you were slow to administer any pain medication!

Anonymous said...

"whatever that is, it's too small. The scale can't measure it.".

Disproportionate response, but he started it and has no right to bitch. People who act like that are more likely to escalate to worse sexual offenses. Cashier may have done the world a favor.

Marco said...

On a camping trip, friends were drinking around the campfire, when one guy plopped his dick on a gal's shoulder from behind. Without missing a beat, she said 'That looks like a penis, only smaller.'

Vivien said...

Potent and John, as males I don't know if you can appreciate the horrible feeling you are left with when some one harasses you in that way. It leaves you feeling literally violated. She did the right thing. if you expose your penis to me in a similar situation, I hope I have the presence of mind to respond as she did. Keep it in you pants boys.

Loren Pechtel said...

@wellillbe: Prevent an assault? He's going to assault her right there in the store?? I very much doubt it. Besides, flashers are normally non-violent.

I fully agree that flashing shouldn't be tolerated but that doesn't mean that there are no limits on how one can respond.

Anonymous said...

Marco, great line, I will remember that one in case I ever need it!

Anonymous said...

"I saw it myself. It wasn't pretty. Big and purple."

you saw it, but how did you know how it happened? i suppose the dude would lie to the doctor and make up another story how it happened, wouldn't he?

SJ said...

Of course it seems highly unlikely that he would've physically assaulted her right there in the store, but he certainly could have waited for her outside. As for flashers "normally" being non-violent, do you really think it matters how they "normally" are when you're the potential victim?

Bottom line, a person who gets off on blatantly violating people's boundaries should be taken as a serious threat.

A Doc 2 Be said...

@ Dr. G...

Aren't they always big and purple?!?!?!?!

PharmGamerKid said...

If this were on Facebook, it would have gotten a *like* from me

Andy Syms said...

A good few years ago a friend of my mother's encountered a flasher. Back then, I don't know if it still holds true now, the flasher had to be 'aroused' for the offence to constitute indecent exposure.

The woman went to the police station to report the incident and was rather taken aback when the desk sergeant seemed to be having trouble not to laugh...

Mum's friend: "I know I'm over 40 and married so I've seen most things but I really think you should take this matter a little bit more seriously."

Desk sergeant: "Sorry madam, this has nothing to do with you and, yes, we take your complaint most seriously. It's just that we had a 16 year old girl in here an hour ago reporting, probably, the same flasher and when we asked her if he had an erection she replied 'No, I think it was a Ford Cortina'".

Mrs J said...

Loren, This grown man whipped out his penis to a cashier that is a teenage girl and you think she shouldn't take that in a threatening way?? Wrong!! Her response alone shows she absolutely felt threatened, I don't know many if any young women that wouldn't feel threatened by such an action and I am surprised you don't think it was dangerous. That young lady responded exactly how she should have and I commend her for standing up for herself and her safety.

Sierra said...

Flashers are sick. I was flashed when I was ELEVEN. And had my younger female cousins who was 9 with me. I still remember every detail. Pervs like that deserving to get their junk smashed. Statistically sexual predators ESCALATE not the opposite/stay the same.

Kat's Kats said...

Loren? Work the lines at a Rape & Sexual Abuse Line for a year... even a few months. As an adult survivor I seriously think you should open your eyes.

My least experience involved a flasher who was giving me a ride to school (back in the early '80s in a small town). He whipped it out, I got out of the car at the next stop, terrified. The next time I saw him I made a BIG deal out of writing down his plate number and never saw him again.

Unfortunately, because of being taught to never tell anyone I didn't turn him into the police. The best I could do was give the plate number to my roommates and tell them if I showed up dead that this was the most likely culprit. Offenders escalate... from fantasy up... it's not an urban myth, it's not something people make up. There is a reason sex offenders have to be isolated in prison. And to disable another myth? Over 90+ of men who abuse males 18 yrs and under identify themselves and heterosexual.

Andy Syms said...

@Kat: 'Taught to never tell anyone' about a sex offender.

WOW! I'm speechless!

Anonymous said...

Loren:

One word: wah!

If he didn't want his winkie whacked, he could have left it in his pants instead of propositioning a teenager.

Anonymous said...

Thatgirl, cool response to the Hardees flasher. Damn shame he had ordered iced tea instead of something hot!

Anonymous said...

lol, that made me lough!

When I was 21 I went to Copenhagen for the first time and went partying with a friend, while we were walking home an guy walks up in a trench coat and flashed us. I started laughing, which is something I do when I'm nervous, stressed or scared, and pointing. the guy ran away really quickly.

Someone told me later that that was one of the correct responses to a flasher.
I don't know what the other correct responses would be though but I think sending a guy to the ER with a crushed penis is one of them.

 
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