Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Seizurebowl

Look, dude, I'm sorry your team lost the Superbowl. I'm not a big sports fan, but I used to be, and so I understand you taking the loss personally.

I also understand having a few drinks to calm down. But being so upset that you missed 2 doses of your epilepsy pills wasn't a good idea (granted, you'd probably have gotten trashed and missed your meds even if the Colts had won, you'd just be happier about it).

No, the state MVD does NOT have an exception to allow you to keep driving in spite of stupid behavior. So you're done driving for a bit.

I AM serious! See? Here's the form, let's look at the exception boxes:

1. Seizures only occur during sleep (not you).

2. Patient has a warning that allows him to take protective action (not you either).

Nope, there isn't a box that says "Patient got shitfaced on cheap beer following his team's Superbowl loss, forgot to take his pills for 2 consecutive doses or go to work on Monday, and had a seizure while arguing with his girlfriend (who happens to be a New Orleans fan but was still nice enough to drive him to his appointment today)".

So let's take our pills and try not to watch sports for a while.

Thank you.

11 comments:

King J's Queen said...

Thank you! Maybe he will learn and not kill someone by being stupid.

Kat's Kats said...

::head:desk::

Karen W said...

Oh. My. Gawd.

Miss Kismet said...

Is your office still taking bets on whether he'll show up in your office after being arrested for driving anyway?

People like this amaze me, really...

Miss Kismet said...

That should read "is your staff taking bets"...I need more diet coke!!

terri c said...

That's, like, totally unfair about his license, you know?? Like, this could so totally happen to anyone and they ought to understand and not be all, rules, you know? NOT fair. Totally.

I cannot help it the devil makes me say these things sometimes. I wonder how often the patient has not taken the med and no one has known 'cause he didn't end up in the hospital!

The Nattipi Man said...

Personally, I'm still coping with Bud Light's losses in the last two Bud Bowls. So how can I abandon my beloved Bud Light in its hour of need?

Anonymous said...

Next time you go back to the restaruant give the waitress the business card of one of the physiologist or therapists that work in your hospital this can be used as a tip! She needs a appointment asap. Im sure you have clout at the hospital and can get her one!

Anonymous said...

Oh, c'monnn! You're being entirely unreasonable. It's not like it's not controlled by medication, he just forgot to TAKE it! Cut a dude some slack.

John Woolman said...

How many neurologists will he have to consult before he finds one who will sign the DMV form. And when he does find one who will be more stupid, him or the neurologist who signs....?

ERP said...

Jeeze, what a bastard you are. I mean come on, doesn't every red-blooded American male drive shitfaced and have seizures now and again?

 
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