Thursday, February 28, 2013

Great moments with MRI facility reps:

Miss Lodestone: "Doctor, our new MRI exposes patients to 75% less X-ray radiation than the previous generation of scanners."

Dr. Grumpy: "MRI doesn't use X-rays. It uses magnetism."

Miss Lodestone: "Correct! Now that modern MRI no longer needs X-rays, we've been able to reduce the amount patients are exposed to in a scan."

Dr. Grumpy: "MRI has never used X-rays. Different physics."

Miss Lodestone: "That's why the new scanners have allowed us to bring it down by 75%!"

40 comments:

jimbo26 said...

LOL , rightttttttttt .

Officer Cynical said...

I'll take one and I can pay cash. The $1 bills are white, the $5s are pink, the $10s yellow, the $20s green, the $50s blue, the $100s yellow, and the $500s gold. They're no longer using the toxic green ink.

Moose said...

That's when you contact the head boss at the company and explain to them that you'll never use their facility because they can't hire sales people who have a basic understanding of physics.

Seriously, I would have said, "You're too stupid to be wasting my oxygen, get out of here."


Also, Officer Cynical - Money for Free Parking, yes or no?

Anonymous said...

Let me guess. She was smokin' hot.

Marie Curie said...

Why didn't anyone tell me this? If I'd discovered MRI's instead of X-rays, I probably would have lived longer!

Nurse Lilly said...

Moose- I suspect her job was based more on her own magnetism than her knowledge of such.

Julie said...

You were way too polite ...

Grumpy, M.D. said...

I try to be. They buy lunch for the staff.

If I tell you I have to kill you said...

You want to say *does your brain hear what your mouth is saying?*

Kara said...

Too soon.

Lisa H said...

I am curious where the other 25% of the unused x-rays are going. Forget physics, she cant do math.

MSGMD said...

"She said that she worked for the ABC News, but that was all of the alphabet that she knew how to use..."

Elvis Costello

Packer said...

In order to get the real reduction in those pesky X Rays you must wear the tin foil hat.

@anon 7:51, So you worked in the business I see.

Anonymous said...

I'm more concerned that their machines are exposing your patients to 25% MORE radiation than their competitors. Seriously? Shouldn't MRI's be exposing the patients to essentially no radiation at all?

-Wu

ronstew said...

Her math is fine. 75% of zero is zero.

Anonymous said...

Packer - I didn't work in the business but my husband's 6'1", 125 pound, drop dead gorgeous but brain dead cousin does. Funny, she's also the leading drug sales rep for her drug...

ndenunz said...

@anon 7:51:
She might be smokin' pot.

Anonymous said...

Good for her! From successful saleslady at Bed, Bath & Beyond selling them useless fragrant soaps to a gig selling multi-million dollar diagnostic imaging equipment.

Then again 30 years after the machines became commercial and years thereafter trying to explain the unfortunate original name of NMR-Nuclear Magnetic Resonance ("no radiation, it's each nucleus of the molecules that are being magnetized")- this dingbat is on the loose to single-handedly confuse people again since the new name for the technology. Sheesh...

Anonymous said...

"Miss Lodestone" Hmmm...
Is this her appellation because of just how attractive she is, or because she's as dumb as a rock?

Oh wait, never mind, I see that she's a medical industry rep - it's both, it's both.

Ivan Ilyich said...

Is this evidence that prolonged exposure to MRI fields scrambles the brain cells?

Ms. Donna said...

*sigh* Physics was not the woman's strong suit.

Obviously. I do agree with previous poster about letting her boss know (nicely) that Ms. Lodestone is getting her facts wrong. Other MDs are not going to be swayed by lunch for the staff and somebody is going to bark!

Anonymous said...

@Anonymous at 1221: A lodestone is a magnetised mineral

Footie said...

.... now the truth comes out! I always thought that stuff about magnetism was just too good to be true.

mincemeet said...

Miss Lodestone: Have I been saying MRI? I meant Xmray. It's new. Please just buy it, I"m pretty, please buy it.

Anonymous said...

It's a xmray! It's new! It gives 25% of the radiation of an x-ray along with the loud noise of an MRI. All with slightly less in picture quality!

Classof65 said...

As an intelligent and decent-looking woman in charge of the department, I always felt insulted when the female sales reps were beautiful but empty-headed. They wasted my time and theirs. Why don't the male doctors resent the waste of their time as well? If the male doctors would speak up, perhaps the companies would find some intelligent and decent-looking women to sell their products -- I'm sure there are some out there.

rethoryke said...

I think the FDA would love to hear about this particular bit of mis-representation...

Charles said...

Ha! Reminds me of the time I was shopping for a washer; the sales rep was telling me that "this machine is so well balanced during its spin cycle because its center-of-gravity is about 3 feet under the ground."

Anonymous said...

I work at a family practice and we get lunch from drug reps a couple times a week. They love saying they are leaving us with great discount cards for all patients to use, no limitations. Having been a pharm tech for years, I know how the discount cards work. I took a rep aside one day and showed him the fine print on the back of the card, and he was genuinely shocked. I'm not making excuses for them, but they're just told to say certain things and don't know any better.

Although if they keep bringing chili and baked potatoes, I will start making excuses for them, 'cause that is my new favorite meal.

Anonymous said...

Now if she would have described her product as artisan...

Patti Cadwallader said...

OMG! She's a robot or the company she's working for is a cult of somekind and has brainwashed her. Don't do business with them!

Loren Pechtel said...

Thank you for letting me know to never refer patients to your facility as you are exposing them to radiation equal to 25% of an x-ray in a procedure that should have none at all.

CC: boss.

EDNurseasauras said...

"Did I say MRI?! I meant MAGIC! Magic!!"

Anonymous said...

pssst... @Anonymous at 134:
@Anonymous at 1221: A lodestone is a magnetised (=attractive) mineral (=rock)
that was the joke.

Whelk Lad! said...

"On the other hand, you do have to take off your clothes and rub your nude body all over with baby oil while your sales manager and a bunch of his friends watch. But still, 75% less radiation!"

Anonymous said...

Maybe she just mixed it up in her head a bit? MRIs actually use a type of low frequency radiation (NOT x-ray, way lower frequency and energy) to flip the spin of the cores. Now, cutting the time of this radiation wouldn't have much effect since it's harmless in the first place, but still... have a little faith in those pretty sales reps

Anonymous said...

Different physics, of course we have different physics, you are male the other female. Some doctors just aren't that smart. Have you been standing to close to the MRI thingy?

Subitarios Nutrix said...

Ms Lodestone: Now, I sell Cat scans with 75% less CATS, so your patients withe cat allergies will be able to withstand the scan...

PharmD20 said...

LMFAO, are you serious?!

L. Paul Strait said...

apropos: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OvmvxAcT_Yc

 
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