Tuesday, December 9, 2014

Dr. Grumpy's gift guide

Does your man like looking at gorgeous women? Probably.

Does he also have a SERIOUS carp fetish?

Okay, maybe the 2nd one is a bit... uncommon. But if he's into both, do I have the gift for you!

The German camping supply company Carponizer proudly introduces their 2015 KarpfenKalender!

"I'm wearing less than this inside. A lot less."

No need to get your guy 2 separate calenders (one with women and another with carp) that he'll be forced to alternate looking at. Now he can have the erotic pleasures of Europe's most beautiful woman AND enormous carp IN ONE GREAT COLLECTION! Every month will bring him pictures of sizzlin' babes and smokin' fish in high-resolution color.

Stunning models and scaly osteichthyes... What more could you want?



Not to be outdone, Carponizer's English rival, Top Fishing Gear, has introduced their own "hot chicks and cold fish" themed calender for 2015, featuring, well, similar stuff:





Either calender would be an ideal gift for a man who enjoys using his rod & reel. Order yours today!

18 comments:

Klara said...

Please tell me that this is not real... You just photoshoped all these pictures, right? :-)

Grumpy, M.D. said...

They're real. You can follow the links above to sites selling them if you want proof. NOTE- I did not receive any payments for featuring any of my gift guide items.

Anonymous said...

"Stunning models and scaly osteichthyes... What more could you want?"

Answer: NOTHING. There is NOTHING more that I want. Thanks Dr. G!

Anonymous said...

Whoa, look at the size of those...gills.

Anonymous said...

The perfect stocking stuffer for Ed.

--Queen Anne's Lace

Anonymous said...

I keep reading 'carp' as 'crap', but that would be an entirely different kind of calendar.

Anonymous said...

Carp has or at least it used to have a special place on the Christmas or New Year's menu in Germany and even other Eastern Euopean countries. The younger generation isn't too keen on it though. I gather this calendar is meant for the 60+ generation.

Anonymous said...

"But honey... I only got it for the fish."

The Condign Gentleman said...

"...and that's where mermaids come from."

Packer said...

So what are they using for bait ?

Jono said...

I can't believe how my appreciation for carp just increased!

Anonymous said...

Oh god, I just read the customer reviews on amazon and can't stop laughing! Thanks for that link!

Anonymous said...

Dr. Grumpy you've been a very bad boy (those naughty calendars tsk! tsk!) so Mrs. Grumpy will have to send you off fishing with the Deadliest Catch crew. May not see any carp but you'll see lots of crab while freezing your petooties.

Note: To Anonymous I am one of those Amazon reviewers and we'd have a field day. LOL!

Ivan Ilyich said...

No bait. I'm guessing they were "noodling."

Anonymous said...

I wonder why one might have an impression the carp might have bypassed pickling, and are actually stuffed, well-placed in the 'lightly' disguised erotica?

bunkywise said...

Once again, the comments ALMOST exceed the post. They're on your tail, Grumpy!

Regina Eldridge said...

That would be "two girls and a carp".

Natalia AL said...

"Rod and reel" hehehehehehehehehe

 
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