Dr. Grumpy: "This is Dr. Grumpy."
Dr. Intern: "HI! I just ran a Depakote level on Mrs. Seizure, and it's ZERO! I just spoke to her. She hasn't had any seizures, but I told her she needs to get in to see you ASAP!"
Dr. Grumpy: "Hang on... She isn't on Depakote. I changed her seizure meds in 2010, and she hasn't taken it since then. So I'd expect it to be zero."
Dr. Intern: "Why doesn't anyone tell me these things?"
Dr. Grumpy: "Well, it was noted in the letters I sent you. Don't you read them? Or check a medication list at each visit?"
Dr. Intern: "Who has time for that?"