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A Blog detailing the insanity of my medical practice and the stupidity of everyday life.
Welcome to my whining!
This blog is entirely for entertainment purposes. All posts about patients, or my everyday life, or anything else may be fictional, or be my experience, or were submitted by a reader, or any combination of the above. Factual statements may or may not be accurate. I could be making all this up. I may not even be a doctor. The only true statement on here is that I probably drink more Diet Coke than you do. A lot more.
Singing Foo!
Singing Foo!
Twitter fans- you can follow me @docgrumpy
Cast of Characters:
Annie: My Phenomenal MA
Mary: My Awesome Secretary
Ed: The office fish
Dr. Pissy: The guy I share an office with
Mrs. Grumpy: My Boss (also the world's greatest school nurse)
Frank, Craig, and Marie: The Grumpy Tribe
Garlic and Riley: The Grumpy Dogs
Questions? Comments? Biting sarcasm? Write to: pagingdrgrumpy [at] gmail [dot] com
Note: I do not answer medical questions. If you are having a medical issue, see your own doctor. For all you know I'm really a Mongolian yak herder and have no medical training at all except in issues regarding the care and feeding of Mongolian yaks.
Cast of Characters:
Annie: My Phenomenal MA
Mary: My Awesome Secretary
Ed: The office fish
Dr. Pissy: The guy I share an office with
Mrs. Grumpy: My Boss (also the world's greatest school nurse)
Frank, Craig, and Marie: The Grumpy Tribe
Garlic and Riley: The Grumpy Dogs
Questions? Comments? Biting sarcasm? Write to: pagingdrgrumpy [at] gmail [dot] com
Note: I do not answer medical questions. If you are having a medical issue, see your own doctor. For all you know I'm really a Mongolian yak herder and have no medical training at all except in issues regarding the care and feeding of Mongolian yaks.
Blog Archive
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2012
(423)
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April
(41)
- Predictive humor
- Sunday Reruns
- We have a great deal for you! CLEAR!
- I had no idea it ever was
- Chaucer, M.D.
- AAN LOTR NOLA
- Thank you, ladies!
- Mary's Desk
- Irony
- Can you be more specific? T-Bone? Rib Eye? Strip?
- Jesus. Now in uniform.
- Questions
- The nerve!
- Marriage: The good, the bad, and the artistic
- Blowing cows to smithereens
- Annie's desk
- Patient quote of the day
- Smooth jazz
- Weekend reruns
- April 14, 1912
- How to rob a bank
- Do they pay you by the word?
- Medical humor
- The country club life
- Great Moments in Crime
- Reasons I'm going to hell
- Mary, bring me a gavel
- Priorities
- Weekend reruns
- Driving safety quiz
- Artisanal: now with artisanally dangerous additives
- Oh yeah, that one
- Bad idea #1
- Bad idea #2
- Great ad placement
- Mary's desk, April 4, 2012
- Wait...
- Time for another advertising quiz
- "Uh, no, officer, that's my, um, girlfriend"
- Patient quote of the weekend
- Random Sunday pictures
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April
(41)
13 comments:
"he rear-ended another driver ..."
I'll bet he did
OMG! BA of .4.. I thought that was a level at which you'd be dead.. just looked it up.. random website says that "coma is likely" at that level...
Well, then it's a good idea he had the butt plug to keep him awake.
"I'm a plug-in hybrid that runs on ethanol."
Well thank you. That was grotesque.
"Also not specified was the make and model of the plug and an explanation of how it ended up in his bottom."
??? How do they THINK it "ended up" in his bottom?
I guessed it was in Florida before the confirming "Hobe Sound".
It not all beer and skittles here like the relatives and friends might tell you.
We are the drunkest state in the onion, an' fluthermore That Martian Counny Deputy prolly coulda blowed a .50 BAC.
That buttplug thing is just plain weird, and disgusting.
From my perspective:
Most "normal" folks are hammered at about .12.
Most of the DUIs that are driving crazy and crashing into stuff are in the .15 to .20 range.
We have to get arrestees medically cleared at the ER if they're over .30 or the jail won't take them.
The hard-core drinkers are easily walking and talking at .25 to .30.
I've had DUIs as high as .44. He was driving down the median, knocking over traffic signs.
I've dealt with super-hard-cores as high as .55, and I've heard of considerably higher.
As with many things in life, experience is everything.
I'm at a loss to understand how using a butt plug is somehow worse than driving drunk.
Seriously?
If you're trying to say that soiling the cop car and otherwise making it an unpleasant experience for the police made a bad situation even worse, sure. But the focus of the article and many of the comments here is on the sex toy, which strikes me as juvenile.
In 2009, over 10,000 people in the US were killed by drunk drivers. How many people were killed with a sex toy?
Ok, so now I find myself googling
How many people were killed by a sex toy ?
@anon 8:47---relax , this blog frequently tries to find the humor in the foibles of humanity. It is not belittling the tragedy of drunk driving death.
Not counting David Carradine , it looks like about 40
Anonymous 8:47 - I've done both. The butt plug was worse.
I love how they're all irritated that there weren't more specifics about the butt plug available! I'm guessing the cop fishing it out of his car wasn't about to whip out a measuring tape and gather some specs! lol
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