I understand you're frustrated. I mean, I would be too if I'd been walking around since yesterday with slurred speech and mild arm weakness. It's a real pisser that you're having trouble texting your real estate clients with your thumb being clumsy like that.
Yeah, I can guess you had a stroke. I'm a neurologist, and I didn't need you to tell me that. I agree that under most circumstances this would be urgent, but my day is full, and having you walk in and start yelling obscenities at Mary because she told you we were booked solid today doesn't increase your sympathy rating around here.
I'm also sorry you were unable to take the appointment she did offer you, tomorrow morning at 8, because you have a meeting with a homeowner's association. I know those things are important. And you have that finance meeting on Thursday at 1, so you couldn't come in then, either. So I guess I'm seeing you on Friday at 3. I know you told Mary that was unreasonably long to have to wait for a stroke, and I'm sorry. Because of my casual dress habits you obviously didn't guess that the doctor was the guy standing in the lobby next to you, because I'd gone up to refill my water bottle.
Mary suggested, several times, that you go to ER, and I was standing there when you refused because you didn't have time for "that sort of nonsense". I told you to go to ER, too, but when you said "who asked you, Buttinski?" I decided to let you keep thinking I was another patient or a drug rep or something. Mary should get a raise for keeping a straight face.
I bet it would surprise you to know that while you were arguing with Mary I walked back to my office to log into the hospital system to see if you'd been there, and, SURPRISE there you were! It looks like you actually went in yesterday, after you'd finished cleaning your pool, and left AMA. The ER doc clearly documented that he wanted to admit you for an inpatient work-up, and you told him he was being unreasonable because then you'd miss the Labor Day barbecue you'd spent all week preparing for. I hope you didn't burn too many burgers with the bad hand.
I'll see you on Friday. Bet you'll be surprised to see what I'm wearing.
53 comments:
Idiot.
If he dies--natural selection.
Unfortunately, his family will probably try to sue the ER doc.
this leaves me practically speechless, to be so consumed with the appts that you have, and the BBQ that you are hosting, than with your own health is ludicrous. What's to say that the there isn't an aneurism there just waiting to happen. I hope you keep us posted as to his reaction when he actually finds out you are the doctor.
A frown? Will you be wearing a frown?
"Now, now, Mr. Jackass, that was no way to talk to my Awesome Secretary."
Gee, I hope that bleeder in his brain doesn't have a buddy waiting in the wings- or the next place you might see him is in the morgue!
She'll probably still have no clue that it was you. Those types (so self-centered) never pay any attention to details other than themselves.
I hope you find a way to politely and professionally mention it!!
I absolutely can not WAIT for Friday's post.
Make sure you give him a rectal exam like Dr. House did.
What a Douche. Too bad the stroke didn't just take his dumb ass out.
Bonus points for signing out AMA in the ER. I'm impressed. Usually, it's the drug addicts who aren't getting their pain meds quick enough.
Curious, what did Douche think the doctors could do for him sans an inpatient work up? Have Ed lay fins upon him for an instant cure?
Good luck not strangling him on Friday.
LD50 Rat
LMAO!!! Ohh, that's gonna be a good one...
With any luck, he'll lose his ability to speak. (Too bad a stroke doesn't cause a person to lose their ability to be an asshole.)
There are 10 levels of awesomeness right here within this post.
I cant wait for Friday to hear about this guys reaction.
You can introduce yourself - "Hi, I'm Dr Buttinski"
Stupid, stupid, stupid. I can tell he prioritizes well. Just imagine when you see him on Friday, he will want a quick cure/fix. I just have to wonder about people, not sometimes, but lately, a lot. Can't wait to see your blog on Friday.
Mary, you are quite a gem, having to put up with such very ignorant, stupid jackasses.
signed, mm
Dipshit. Would you want someone like him representing you in a transaction possibly involving a lot of moula?
Oh, I'd love to see the look on his face when you walk through the door to exam him. See, that's why I like you. You let him say that to you in the waiting room and didn't make a peep about who you were. Love it!
Poetic justice! Please post a follow-up after the appointment. I NEED to hear how he reacts when he walks in to see Dr. Buttinski.
Priorities:
That thing is more important than anything else, at least in your own eyes
I expect he'll tell God, or more likely the Devil, that he really doesn't have time to be dead either!
Is it possible that stroke is in his frontal lobe affecting his judgment?
-whitecap nurse
Doubt it. Clinical presentation ("Clumsy hand-dysarthria syndrome") suggests lacunar stroke in internal capsule.
sweeet!! i cant wait til friday's post!
Looking forward to Friday!
I am shocked you were filling YOUR WATER BOTTLE.
looking forward to Friday's follow up on the jack ass
okay ,this is for everybody, here.
IS IT FRIDAY YET?
signed, mm
Wish I could say I was honestly amazed but no. And there is no gender discrimination going on in the pompous and self-righteous department.
Yes, I know my cervix is VERY short and funneling and that I am 40+ years old and 29 weeks pregnant with my first child but I have a law office to run--
Good luck Friday!!
Lonely Midwife - so whatever did she get pregnant for? She won't have time for a baby either and we all know how babies won't change our lives!!! (FOFL!)
(Sign in - diathix - some new medication?)
"Buttinski". LOL
HAH! I love it! Please let us know how Friday goes :D
So, did he drive himself to your office???
I'm wondering what he wants on Friday? Oh, maybe he doesn't have any plans for the weekend.
We'll all be dutifully reminding you for a post this Friday. For best effect, wear the same outfit you wore when you 1st saw him and carry the waterbottle too just incase he missed your face...
You've just given me a better reason to anticipate Friday!
Sounds like some of our characters in the ER-just don't have TIME to have a stroke or an MI today-maybe tomorrow they'll come back in for the work-up--God FORBID their health issues interrupt their busy schedule.
I like to throw a sheet over them, then tell them "This is you tomorrow---who's going to keep your appointments?"
It makes them THINK......if they have 2 brain cells to rub together!
So bummed it is onlyWednesday. I love LD50 Rat's suggested instant treatment via Ed. Too funny!!!
Like all the others, I can't wait to hear about Friday, assuming he's still alive.
I wonder how many appointments he'll miss if he's...dead?
Perhaps they could have hooked him up to the rotisserie for that BBQ?
Nitwit.
That has got to be the stupidest thing I have ever heard in my life.
D
Mary deserves a raise!
Am I the one person in the world who, if I hear my lawyer/real estate agent/whatever has had a major health problem, thinks "Hey! Maybe my meeting can wait!"?
Idiots. Oh well, chlorine for the gene pool.
I'm adding to your keyboard tally, because I just spit diet coke in mine.
Friday can't come soon enough. Heh.
That poor man. And poor Dr. Grumpy.
Denial is the pits.
I got $5 on a no-show for Friday, he'll have to get his BMW washed.
"Clinical presentation ("Clumsy hand-dysarthria syndrome") suggests lacunar stroke in internal capsule."
Not that one stroke is better than another, but is this one better than another?? Is it like a TIA?? Is the big one commin??
You are so awesome...I love how you stayed incognito.
I'm with anonymous about the no-show...........
please give us an update on friday.. including you wiping his shit eating grin off his face lol
"Have Ed lay fins upon him for an instant cure?"
OMG! My gut hurts.
Looking forward to Friday.
Why am I the only one who ISN'T lookign forward to Friday here? Hmm...
I reckon that the guy is so self centered, arrogant and egotistical that he won't even recognize Dr Grumpy as the buttinsky.
Dr. G - you said you are the only one not looking forward to Friday - I personally cant wait to hear if he even showed up - or if another work-related something took precedence!
So....did he show?
>:)
Doris
Jesus. I hope he found someone to see ("besides you" is only implied, of course). You "doubt" that the stroke may have influenced his behavior?
As interesting as the patient sounds, what I really want to know is how Dr. Grumpy managed to get a water cooler that dispenses Diet Coke....
318.2
Just saying
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