Saturday, September 12, 2009

Weekend On Call- The Phone Calls

Dr. Grumpy: "This is Dr. Grumpy, returning your call".

Mr. Phone: "Um, yeah. I see Dr. Notoncall, and she has me on Aspirin 325mg once a day for a stroke, and, um, I was wondering if I can change it to the baby Aspirin 81mg size once a day instead?

Dr. Grumpy: "Are you having stomach problems or bruising, or another problem with it?".

Mr. Phone: "No."

Dr. Grumpy: "Then why do you want to change it? If Dr. Notoncall told you to take 325mg I assume she had a reason."

Mr. Phone: "Cuz my buddy, Phil at the paint shop, told me he thinks the 81mg is gonna be better for me. Ya see, my girlfriend bought me the bottle of 325mg after my stroke, but she and I broke up yesterday, and I'm not gonna see her again. So Phil pointed out that since she's the one who got me the 325mg size, maybe now that she's left it's not a good idea for me to be taking them, and so I should change sizes to something she didn't buy me".

(Long pause)

Dr. Grumpy: "Sir, I think you should stay on the 325mg pills. It's what Dr. Notoncall told you to take."

Mr. Phone: "Is that safe? Cuz my ex-girlfriend bought them, and Phil said..."

Dr. Grumpy (interrupting): "If it's that important to you, then you can buy your own bottle of the 325mg and get rid of the one she bought you."

Mr. Phone: "Am I allowed to do that?"

Dr. Grumpy: "Yes."

Mr. Phone: "Okay, but I'm gonna go to a different store than she did."

31 comments:

Easily Lost said...

Please, please, please tell me, you made that up.

Grumpy, M.D. said...

Sorry. It be true. Yeah, I was pretty shocked, too.

"Police suspect alcohol was involved."

Mickey said...

Thanks for sending another one of "them" to the pharmacies...
- A disgruntled CPhT

Grumpy, M.D. said...

It was only Aspirin, not a script. Maybe he can get some at Phil's paint shop.

ER's Mom said...

Yak herding is sounding better and better every call...but then you wouldn't have the stories for the blog!

;)

Jacqueline said...

wow

TranscriptionistTia said...

I would have suggested that it was on sale at any store other than the one I go to.

rxgirl said...

are you kidding me? these people come from the jungle or something? I'm still shaking my head...

Peg said...

speechless!

Anonymous said...

Pretty sick of people taking medical advice from non-doctors, non-nurses, non-pharmacists and the like, then challenging our educated opinions with what the TV said, or what their neighbor's cousin's chiropractor recommends to the neighbor's cousin.

You know, just, why bother even asking me if you already know? Let me spend my time with people who can benefit from my advice, m'kay?

I mean!

Steph Rx

J. Andrew said...

What the heck is wrong with people?

Dana said...

When I need advice about my stroke meds, Phil at the Paint Shop is the only guy I trust. He obviously knows more about it than some neurologist.

Anonymous said...

Apparently Dr. Notoncall also has some real gems for patients. Maybe it's neurology in general - neurologists probably treat more patients with cognitive impairment than other specialties.
BTW, I'm a nursing student, and I really enjoy your blog. Thank you for entertaining me when I should be (1)studying for a test and (2) writing a psychiatric care plan.

MAG

Stephanie D said...

Maybe he'll come in with the ex's bottle and make us annotate his profile that he's now "allergic" to that brand.

That would be just super fun.

Chris@Maugeritaville said...

Sounds like he needs something stronger than aspirin.

Of course, there's always the possibility that he wasn't the crazy one in that last relationship, and his precautions are completely necessary.

Gert said...

That's Incredible...!

Anonymous said...

I can see why she broke up with him.

modesty press said...

I know you asked me to paint your wall white, but I have some purple left over from my last job so I will save you some money by using that can of paint up. I'm sure you don't mind.

Bella said...

aspirin is the least of his worries! LOL he needs something for his schizophrenic paranoia for goodness sakes!

Anonymous said...

Ouch, my brain hurts trying to follow that no train of thought.

Are you sure your not a shrink? Or are you just a kook magnet?

LD50 Rat

Flavius said...

I agree with another poster, she may just be that diabolical and that crafty to have poisoned his bottle 'after' she broke up with him. And not only that one, but every bottle at the store where she got them from. However, he's got one up on her, he's going to a 'different' store to get a 'different' brand... that'll show her.

-Flavius

Anonymous said...

Pressure in head going up from not being able to release guffaw in public place--gotta get outa here before my head explodes or burst out laughing uncontrollably.

Just how do you do it, Dr. G. to avoid laughing in these folks' ear on a phone call?

Serious Replies Only said...

Seriously?? Seriously??

Punch said...

they all vote

The Good Cook said...

Wait! Maybe they broke up because the girlfriend was poisoning him... or maybe there was voodoo involved! Or maybe the girlfriend is a figment of his imagination? Or Phil is really a transvestite...or Phil is trying to kill him.. I'm thinking there's more to this story than meets the eye.

Anonymous said...

Doc, I have some spots on the motorcycle tank and rear fender that need touching up, can you work me in soon, there's a big ride-in in Reno coming up?

Lipstick said...

I wonder if Phil at the paint shop has any openings on Monday for a work-up for persistent migraines.

psychnursen said...

When I first became a psych nurse I learned that in the "old days" Neurology used to handle all of Psych -- Maybe this wasn't that long ago!?

I know people comment that this MUST be made up - but being a psych nurse in a LARGE inner city hospital - let me assure you that Yes, people really are this stupid!!

Anonymous said...

Wow really? The crazies call you for these things? Usually they just come into our pharmacy when we're really busy and can't properly take the time for a real chuckle. People really make my head hurt sometimes!

Leah said...

It makes me feel a sense of comradely to know that other professions have to deal with this-- yesterday I had a customer insist that she needed Tylenol without acetaminophen in it, because Tylenol helped her leg pain, but the acetaminophen gave her cramps. I have no idea what she ended up buying- after several unsucessful attempts to explain I handed her over to the stock clerk to show her where the "regular" Tylenol was.

--PharmD

Anonymous said...

o_O
......

 
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