Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Random Weirdness

So tonight we made a Costco run to stock up on life essentials like Diet Coke and cookies. Mrs. Grumpy was straight from work, and still in scrubs.

So we're loading up the minivan, and suddenly this wild-eyed lady runs up to us.

"Excuse me! Excuse me!" I'm always afraid this is going to be one of my patients, but she ignored me and went straight after Mrs. Grumpy (who was wrestling with a bag of dogfood).

Mrs. Grumpy: "Uh, can I help you?"

Ms. Wildpsycho: "Yes! Please! Do you work at Local Hospital?"

Mrs. Grumpy: "Uh, no..."

Ms. Wildpsycho: "Where do you work! What do you do! Please! Tell me!"

Mrs. Grumpy: "I'm a school nurse."

Ms. Wildpsycho: "JESUS FREAKING CHRIST! YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY NO HELP TO ME AT ALL, ARE YOU?!!! WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WITH THAT?!!!"

She stomped off.

I tossed the dogfood in the car.

WTF?

20 comments:

The Scomnog Man said...

Obviously, she was in the middle of performing brain surgery at Local Hospital when they suddenly ran out of gauze and she had to run out to Costco to pick up a carton. Her car broke down in the parking lot and she desperately needed a ride back. She only had 15 minutes left to get back to the hospital, finish the surgery and vacate the OR because it had been booked for a "Twilight"-themed Sweet 16 party and the band and caterer needed to set up.

FreaksRUs said...

I'm glad that you and your wife seem to be freak-magnets. Hopefully that will keep the freaks (or at least more of them) away from me.

Rusty Salmon said...

Almost make you want to follow her and ask.

Almost.

Doctor D said...

There's an epidemic of Swine Flu panic attacks going around. I bet she was all wacky over the H1N1.

Lots of people showing up in the ER: "I'm here cause I got exposed to that killer swine flu!"

Yup, and by coming here an sitting in the waiting room you exposed yourself again to a room full of it. Thanks for helping share this novel influenza! Have a nice day.

LilMsHppyPillz said...

Welcome to our world Mrs. Grumpy.

The Good Cook said...

And I thought I was the only one with an invisible F tattooed on my forehead making me a FREAK magnet. Your powers are so much stronger than mine.

Barb said...

LOL Scumnog Man! People ask me medical questions alot. I'm a "Dr." but I have a PhD in biological sciences. I'm not a physician or a vet. Yet I'm constantly getting asked stuff as if I were.

Grumpy, M.D. said...

"I'm not a doctor. But I play one in the Costco parking lot"

Anonymous said...

And this is why I never ever wear scrubs in public. Ever.

CK Lunchbox said...

Jeez, what did she want? A second opinion on her mental condition?

SumDood said...

Have some sympathy, people! Sheesh!! Maybe she was just looking for a referral for someone to clean her house. Ever think of that?

Andrea said...

Some of these people HAVE to be doing this for kicks. Some of them HAVE to be just frakking with you.

Makes me wanna wear scrubs in public, and then look at people in confusion and say, "I'm an accountant. Not a medical professional."

Hee.

webhill said...

and that is why, when people stop me in the parking lot next to my car with a veterinary-type license plate, and say "excuse me, are you a vet?" I just say "nope, my husband is, this is his car" and drive away.

moppie said...

So, what do you do if you bump into one of your patients outside the office? Do you pretend not to see them? Do patients stalk you ever?

Grumpy, M.D. said...

Moppie- usually it's not an issue. We just say hi. The ones who try to use it as a curbside consult I tell to call my office.

Fordo said...

I used to work in the legal field. Generally we try to work in a different neighborhood from the one we live in. When we do have a chance encounter with a client, it results in some comical hiding or hasty departures.

ERP said...

Sounds like Nurse K referred you a new patient.

Square Peg Guy said...

This actually kinda makes me want to buy a set of scrubs to wear out in public. I might never have to think of material for my blog ever again!

Maha said...

Ahhhh! That happened to me on my way home from work - I lost it at the guy and yelled at him on the train!

Silver said...

The nice thing about practicing -psychiatry- in a remote area is that people generally leave you the hell alone.

The bad thing about practicing blahblahblah is that sometimes they shout at you across the store from the pharmacy, "HEY, SILVER, I NEED MY HALDOL REFILLED, JOE THE PHARMACIST SAID HE FAXED YOU BUT I GUESS YOU'RE WORKING THE OTHER CLINIC TODAY, CAN YOU COME OVER HERE AND OKAY IT?"

Either very well-defined boundaries or very.... permeable boundaries. And, really, do I want Patient X non-Haldolized?
I do not.

I figure if I do that, he's less likely to accost the neurologist in the parking lot.

 
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