Friday, May 16, 2014

Guest post

Dr. Coogie writes in:

Last night I got called down to ER to admit a guy for syncope.

Dr. Coogie: "What happened?"

Mr. DUI: "Well I was drinking beer at Boobpile and I passed out."

Dr. Coogie: "How long were you out?"

Mr. DUI: "Not sure. I woke up on the floor with everyone around me, but then realized I still had more beer to finish, so I had some more beer and decided I should get checked out."

Dr. Coogie: "Okay, and then you had someone bring you here?"

Mr. DUI: "No, I had spilled beer on my clothes so I drove home to change, then drove to the ER, and here we are."


Gracie's Mom said...

Well at least he had his priorities in order.

J said...

Similar story to what some of my clients share with me. I finally had to make a policy that if I can smell alcohol on you, you have to make another appointment and arrive sober.

One particular client had so many DUIs that he lost his license, and his documents took more time to craft than his appointment allowed. I offered to have him come back when I finished the afternoon appointments and he agreed. When he returned, he not only smelled of alcohol, he had driven himself home and back to the agency after having 'just a little beer' with his lunch.

a.generic doc said...

This is just an extension of his mother teaching him to always wear clean underwear in case he's in an accident and has to be brought to the ER.

Coogie MD said...

awesome! Thanks for the post Dr. Grumpy!

Loren Pechtel said...

Like attracts like.

A boob at the boobpile.

Struck by a Turtle said...

I will bet a twenty he's on Medicaid.

The Condign Gentleman said...

"Trust me, if you don't get Westvleteren 12 out of your tuxedo right away, you may well wind up having to send it back to London because it will stain and only your personal tailor will be able to fix the damage. Take it from one who knows."

Anonymous said...

"You have to live by the code when a bro ices you."

Anonymous said...

"I figured I was going to be coming to the hospital in a couple of hours anyway to perform that triple bypass, so I might as well swing by home and put on my scrubs."

Anonymous said...

You still admit patients, not just do consults? Why don't you dump admissions on hospitalists?

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