Thursday, July 19, 2012

Assumptions

Mary: "Is there a problem, ma'am?"

Mrs. Ink: "Yes. I don't like having to fill out these forms with a pen tied to the clipboard."

Mary: "I'm sorry, but before we started tying them on we were losing 2-3 pens a day. That adds up."

Mrs. Ink: "Ridiculous. You get pens for free from drug companies, anyway."

Mary: "We used to, but that was banned effective January 1, 2009. So now we buy our own office supplies like everyone else."

Mrs. Ink: "Everyone knows doctors are rich. I can't believe your cheap boss just doesn't buy more pens."



30 comments:

jimbo26 said...

Carry a pen with you ? Simples .

Anonymous said...

She's just pissed that she can't steal the pen.

Mrs. Higrens said...

Drug companies always bought the nicest pens - I miss them.

Andy Syms said...

Hi Mary

Your boss is so cheap he's even started cutting back on the number of letters he uses in his blog posts.

Mary said...

I have been in several doc's offices that have silk flowers attached to the pens. Just get a roll of floral tape (99 cents) and some silk flowers. Marie could do them for you.

It is hard to "forget" and stick pen with a 4 or 5" flower on the top in your pocket or purse.

I like to use certain pens at work and I get mad if I forget and carry them home because my husband latches on to them. I don't buy them but they are MINE.

Christina Roberts said...

For Pete's sake. I have THREE pens in my purse. Talk about miserly, buy your own damn pen, lady.

Anonymous said...

When I was just a wee bit more than a child, my parent's instructed me that a pen was an essential, you must carry a pen and I have ever since. I never use some germy pen at the doctors office, what the hell are they thinking, it could have mersa, c diff, cooties or worse. There now everyone will carry their own pen.

Don said...

Typical, of course. What used to annoy me, but these days amuses me, are the places that have strings attached to their pens, where the length of the string is fine for right handed people, but awful for those of us Eternally Cursed by Cthulhu to be left handed. My penmanship isn't what it used to be, so I don't fret about it.

Anonymous said...

Did you check her purse for the free toilet paper that patients think they're entitled to?
You wonder why there's no toilet paper in the little cupboard under the sink -- it's cause people like you steal it!!

Anonymous said...

Don, I was thinking the same thing. Unless someone who is left handed strings the pen on the clipboard it's not long enough. When I was still teaching I would erase the chalkboard as I wrote on it! I truly feel your pain! Ironically, all the left handed students were placed in my room, EVERY YEAR!

I carry my own pen, and prefer to use it (who knows who used it before you)! Mrs. Ink would have probably complained HAD it not been tied because she would drop it or forget to return it and then it would be Mary's fault that she took the pen. She was looking to be a PITA and nothing would have made her happy!

Li'l Azathoth said...

"In fact, why are you even using pens and paper? Shouldn't you just give every patient an iPad?"

Catbird said...

What I love how doctors and dentists are using online forms to fill up and bring. It's much easier and then you don't have to worry about some nose-picking person's germs.

Ami said...

I'm a pen carrier. Don't like pens that scratch on the paper, and that seems to be the only kind you cheap doctors like to buy. :)

Seriously... I like to doodle. And I'm really particular about my doodling. Signo 1mm. Black ink. Once you try it, you'll never go back. :)

brent said...

"special commerative Dr. Grumpy pens are for sale in the gift shop."

Nana said...

Something I learned after losing a very good, expensive (gift) pen ... use a ballpoint with a cap, and put the pen on the counter without the cap. Fewer people will steal an uncapped pen.

Anonymous said...

How does she do crosswaord puzzles while she's waiting, then?

Anonymous said...

I have a shit-ton of pens and other stuff that were "destroyed" when the drug companies began to get rid of the that stuff after giving it out was banned.

BizzyMomma said...

Brent, do those pens in the gift shop come with the string already attached!

Anonymous said...

@Ami- you haven't really lived till you've tried the Pilot Hi-Tec C.

Anonymous said...

Isn't the real question here "why can't your cheap patients just not steal pens?"

Moose said...

"I'm not Rich, I'm Grumpy!"
(ba-dum-pum TING!)

Thank you, thank you, I'll be here all week. Don't forget to tip your veal and try your waiter!

burnttoast said...

Everyone knows doctors are rich. Right. Everyone but us doctors. Geez. I wish.

ahyesplans said...

I always carry my own pen. Office pens = Oh what a lovely way to contract (the flu, norovirus, c diff, MRSA, etc)

nyllrap said...

Amazing! I know a kindergarten teacher who had a student who never brought a snack for the official snack time. Of course, the teacher felt bad so she always gave the child something from her self-purchased snack stash. When the teacher questioned the child about why she never had a snack the child said, "My momma said you can give me a snack since you make a nice salary."

was1 said...

I'd just steal the clipboard, too.

Ms. Donna said...

Don,

Like you, I am Eternally Cursed by Cthulhu. Of course, we lefties are the envy of the right-hand world.

And as our favorite Yak Herder could tell you, we are the only ones in our right minds!

SMHDVM said...

Charge a pen tax....like $0.25 deposit and it is returned when they are finished. It is almost an asshole tax, but not exactly.

Anonymous said...

We have plastic spoons with faces drawn on them duct-taped to our counter pens.

And what everyone else said: If you don't want to use the pen that's tied down, use your own. I always hated the pens that were tied down because I'm left-handed and they were inevitably tied with a very short string to the right side of the clipboard.

Anonymous said...

I had a teacher who would take your shoe as collateral when you borrowed a pen or pencil from her.
It never ceased to amaze me how many students, of all ages, wouldn't have a single pen, pencil, or piece of paper on the FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL.

Anonymous said...

"So why are visiting us today, Mrs. Ink?"
"I'm all out of pens."

 
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