Sunday, April 25, 2010

On call- Sunday morning.

Phone guy: "Drs. Brain & Nerve's answering service, can I help you?"

Dr. Grumpy: "Yeah, this is Dr. Grumpy, covering for Drs. Brain and Nerve. Are there any consults holding overnight?"

Phone guy: "Umm. Let me look. Yeah, 3. So you have another consult for them? Can I have the name?"

Dr. Grumpy: "No, I need the names of the ones you've been holding overnight."

Phone guy: "Is the new consult for Drs. Brain and Nerve? Because Dr. Grumpy is covering for them, and will see the patient."

Dr. Grumpy: "No! This is Dr. Grumpy!"

Phone guy: "Oh, so the new consult is for Dr. Grumpy directly? He doesn't use our service, but I can give you his office number."

Dr. Grumpy: "I AM DR. GRUMPY!"

Phone guy: "Dr. Grumpy? Are you calling in for the overnight consults?"

Dr. Grumpy: "YES!"

Phone guy: "I'm sorry sir. You should have said that in the first place."

19 comments:

Old MD Girl said...

Sounds like the company my husband works at.

Anonymous said...

I work nights...Yes, I can honestly say, dealing with some of these people at the services...OMG...really. spell my name? but I have a simple name..such as ex: mary..can you spell that..because there are many ways to spell it...if i hear that one more time. Or calling another svc during the night for a stat consult, they ask you if it is stat , and no kidding put you on hold for sometimes up to 3-4 minutes..don't know why, haven't given any info yet. gosh dr g. i am glad it's not just us other overnighters, that deal with these people...

mm

erichollins said...

Just a quick tip that I've learned. Whenever answering the phone or calling someone, I pause for about 2 seconds. It's just long enough to get someone's attention because there have been way too many times where a conversation goes like this.

/ringringring
Me: Hello, $name speaking.
Them: Yes, can I speak to $name?

Or, I may just start picking up the phone from unknown callers and just say "Hi!".

A Doc 2 Be said...

Hearing aids work wonders, so I've heard...

Cthulhu Sashimi said...

Yet another case of life imitating Cheech and Chong routines.

Albinoblackbear said...

Clearly he needed a consult as well.

Sarah said...

I've been labeled as "formidable", so I would have said, "I DID say it in the first place", please, oh please, tell me you said that. You can't let these idiots keep being idiots.

ER's Mom said...

Yeah, I feel the agony.

Sometimes I think the answering service is staffed by trained baboons.

Kat's Kats said...

Are you sure his name isn't Brain Dead Guy? Or maybe he just didn't have enough Diet Coke overnight.

Sandra said...

Cthulu, that was the first thing i thought of. Here is the link to the routine.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RI7trKKoDSA

WV: NUMBO, a contraction of numbskull and dumbo

GB, RN said...

In times such as this, only one word can sum it up nicely.

Derp!

The Bus Driver said...

Whose on first?

LOL

That is all.

Moose said...

Dude, do you think they're hiring? I can't seem to find a job where they want competent people. I know I'm probably overqualified but, hey...

[today's captcha word is: deedl. as in deedl deedl deedl dum?]

Liz said...

Maybe he's working off his neurology office bill.....

The Mother said...

Yep. This is exactly why we fired our answering service and went to one of those new-fangled computerized thingies.

Plus the day when my kid broke his leg, I put in three calls to hubby, and the answering service didn't bother to beep him even once.

ERP said...

Holy Acquired Cretinism Disorder Batman!

Rogue Medic said...

erichollins,

Just a quick tip that I've learned. Whenever answering the phone or calling someone, I pause for about 2 seconds.


I wouldn't be surprised if at 2 seconds they forget why they picked up the phone and just hang up. These are the people who will populate Harrison Bergeron's world. We shouldn't be there, yet.

I also immediately thought of the Cheech and Chong routine.

Claudia said...

Actually, switching to French helps a lot in those situations.

Anonymous said...

I worked for a large clinic system overnights for years while working on my degree. We answered for 51 clinics, an insurance nurse line, and took calls from hospitals all over the upper half of the state for MD consults. Yes, some operators are less than competent, however, there are a lot of champs answering those phones at night too.

And, yes, sometimes we don't hear you and we have to ask you to spell your name. Ever tried to talk to someone who calls you all sleepy and slurred at 3 AM? Try memorizing the names, pagers, protocols, and idiosyncrasies of 750 doctors and all sorts of affiliated techs, CRNAs, PAs, and assorted other providers and see if you don't occasionally sound like a moron, too. :O)

 
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