Monday, June 28, 2021

Musical interlude

Local hospital, like every hospital, has an overhead public address system to page doctors, announce emergencies, and inform visitors of flash specials on stuffed animals in the gift shop.

Mistakes occasionally happen. Sometimes a hospital operator hits the wrong button, so you get a few seconds of someone dialing a phone, or talking to another operator, or the hospital's hold music, or (if the hold music is broken) a local radio station. The operators are actually in an off-campus office, so if a problem occurs it can take a minute for them to find out and correct it.

So yesterday, I was on call, doing a consult in the ICU. A cardiologist was paged overhead to the cath lab, but then the operator hit the wrong button and we got a local radio station.

Normally people just ignore this, but by sheer chance this was what was on the air:

"Another one bites the dust,
Another one bites the dust, Yeah!
And another one's gone and another one's gone
Another one bites the dust!"*

Later in the afternoon there were apology notices up in all the elevators, saying the hospital would be upgrading the PA system to prevent such occurrences.

*Although not intended in this way, you can use either this or "Stayin' Alive" to do CPR properly.


Packer said...

Next up Blood Sweat and Tears, And when I die….

bobbie said...

Years ago, I worked in a county hospital; the morgue was in the basement. On night shift, we would sing that song as we took the deceased down there ~

vegakitty said...

Years ago I worked in a military hospital, and right as we were moving into the new facility from the old one there was a readiness exercise for the military members. I heard this announcement over the PA system: "Will all members of the Red Team who have not done so, please do so immediately. Thank you." I could hear laughter outside my clinic doors, and a moment later another announcement was heard, "Will all members of the Red Team who have not checked in at the Manpower Table please do so immediately. Thank you." The first month or so in that new facility was a hoot, as we didn't have phone lists or signs on the office doors or accurate maps. I was visited by a lot of wide-eyed people who were clutching maps and looking for Family Practice; my clinic was on the first floor,and Family Practice was directly above us on the second floor.

Kim said...

When I had my wisdom teeth removed the dentist had music playing. The last song I remember hearing before the anesthesia took hold was Knockin' On Heaven's Door. Yikes.

Greg said...

Let's just say that the same classic Queen song didn't go over very well in the waiting room at the emergency vet clinic, either.

The kleenex boxes are well distributed in that room for a reason, and it ain't cat allergies...

Unknown said...

Sitting with my 90 year dad in the waiting room at his gerontologist's office, and they music was playing "Don't Fear the Reaper". I chuckled.

Band nerd said...

Our marching band once played that song during a break in football play. The band director was unaware the football stopped because an opposing player was injured.

That song was then banned from marching band for many years.

Anonymous said...

"Mother, I just killed a man..."

McDuckGA said...

A friend of mine had that played at his funeral.

Anonymous said...

I can't stop laughing. Does that make me a bad person?

Anonymous said...

Death Cab for Cuties.
I"ll Follow You Into the Dark, live version preferred.
Sweet Dreams, Marilyn Manson creepy version.
Morphine & Chocolate, 4 Non Blondes.

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