Friday, June 29, 2018

Random pictures

All right, time to hit the mailbag for stuff you guys have sent in.

First we have this delightful hand lotion:

Then we have this playground equipment, apparently designed prior to Copernicus, or the discovery of the sun for that matter:

Here's a "trending" news item, apparently created by a random word generator in Wisconsin:

Here's a mystery question that a reader says was part of her on-line medical license renewal:

Then there was this guide to grilling that could have used an extra word:

Wednesday, June 27, 2018

Seen in a chart

Monday, June 25, 2018

The Master

In the 1980's Mojo Nixon claimed "Elvis is Everywhere." While anyone who visits Vegas might concur, I have to disagree.

Here, at Grumpy Neurology, Yoda is everywhere.

Sure, he may be in many disguises, but even a Jedi Master can't hide that characteristic language pattern from a trained DoC* like me.

The following are quotes I've encountered:

From patients:

"Twenty-one headaches I had in May. Many migraines that is."

"Make the seizures stop, can you?"

"I tried to talk, but speech-wise, I could not." 

"Much pain my back does have."

"Forgot you also this, Topamax, work it did not."

In an MRI report:

"Nothing abnormal does the MRI show."

From a nurse:

"Ativan received at 8:00, she did."

From a drug rep:

"Reduction in pain they will have, yes."

From my secretary:

"3:15 tomorrow his appointment is."

And (my favorite) was this patient interaction:

Dr. Grumpy: "You really need to stop overusing Excedrin."

Lady Rebound: "It's hard, but I'll try."

Mr. Rebound: "No! Do... or do not. There is no try."

*Disciple of Charcot

Wednesday, June 20, 2018

Blood pressure and other things

Mrs. Methodical: "My blood pressures have been good, too."

Dr. Grumpy: "I'm glad. What have they been running?"

Mrs. Methodical: "I have a list in my purse. Would you like to see it?"

Dr. Grumpy: "Certainly."

She rummaged in her purse for a minute, then handed me this:

Monday, June 18, 2018


Dr. Grumpy: "Any side effects with the new pill?"

Mr. P: "Only one, it makes my urine smell like something terrible."

Dr. Grumpy: "Okay and what about..."

Mr. P: "I brought some, in case you want to smell it."

Pulls Tupperware container out of bag.
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