One day Sadie, who lives down the hall, comes over. "Jake," she says, "tomorrow the group bus is going over to see that new movie, and I'd like to go. But I haven't been to a movie since my husband died, and I'm nervous about going alone. Will you go as my date?"
Jake thinks for a moment. "You know, I haven't seen a movie since my wife died. I'd like to... But I have a request. Whenever we'd go to movies, I'd unzip, and my wife would hold my winkie during the film. Would you do that for me?"
Sadie thinks about it. "Why not? We're both in our 80's. What have I got to lose?" So they go to the theater, she holds his penis for the whole 90 minutes, and they both have a good time.
This goes on for the next several months, at every Wednesday movie outing.
Then, one day, Sadie calls to make sure they're on for that afternoon's trip, but Jake can't go. "I have a cold, Sadie. Sorry."
And the next time. "Sadie, I have a doctor's appointment."
And the next: "Oh, Sadie. I can't. I have to wash my hair."
"Jake, you don't have hair."
"I mean, the hair on my back."
This continues for another few weeks. Finally, Sadie confronts Jake outside the day room.
Sadie: "Jake, what's really going on? Why aren't you going to the movies with me anymore? No excuses."
Jake: "I... I've been going to them with Irma instead. I didn't know how to tell you without hurting your feelings."
Sadie: "IRMA? In room 507? Why? What does Irma have that I don't?"
Jake: "Parkinson's disease."