Wednesday, April 23, 2014


Mr. Larsson is sitting in the lobby, reading old issues of People, during his wife's appointment. Suddenly he walks up to Mary's desk, holding a small plastic box.

Mary: "Can I help you, sir?"

Mr. Larsson: "Do you have a land-line?"

Mary: "Yes."

Mr. Larsson: "I need to make a call, and can't use a cell phone."

Mary: "Okay, that's fine, just come around the counter there."

He sets the plastic box on the counter, comes over to the desk, and starts unbuttoning his shirt.

Mary: "What are you doing?"

Mr. Larsson: "I need to send a pacemaker report to my cardiologist's office, and we don't have a land-line at home."

He tosses his shirt on a chair and starts attaching clips from the box to his chest. 

"Wanna see the scar?"

Mary: "Um, I don't know how to send a pacemaker report..."

Mr. Larsson: "Can you unplug one of your phone lines and hand me the cord?"

Mrs. Larsson and I finish her appointment. She opens my office door and walks up front.

Mrs. Larsson: "ARNE! PUT YOUR SHIRT ON!"

Mr. Larsson: "But I need to..."

Mrs. Larsson: "NO! I told you, we'll stop at Dr. Senning's office tomorrow, and you can do it directly. You don't need to do this today!"

Mr. Larsson: "But Dr. Grumpy has a land-line!"

Mrs. Larsson: "So does Dr. Senning! Here's your shirt! I'm sorry, Mary, he's just very obsessive about this."

They leave. The door closes. Mary and I stare blankly at each other for about 10 seconds. Then collapse in hysterics.


Suze said...

After reading this I am so glad dad has an automatic device beside his bed. At least life is far from dull.

Anonymous said...

Larsson - oh, lol!

Hattie said...

Disinhibition. Now there's a word for you!

Steeny Lou said...

I get such a kick out of the names you choose! Good one there on Arne Larsson!

EDNurseasauras said...

You can leave your hat on.....

Anonymous said...

That is hilarious! I'm a RN and worked in a cardiology clinic. Most of those patients are so non-compliant with doing telephone checks that cracks me up me one actually was so intent on transmitting!

Anonymous said...

I am surprised that Officer Cynical is not demanding royalties for the use of his photo.

Officer Cynical said...

Here's how you can tell this isn't me: he's wearing a bow tie. I wouldn't be caught dead wearing a bow tie. Otherwise, I can see how you'd be confused.

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