Thursday, August 2, 2012

Effort

Today I'd like to share this bracelet, which was sent in by Beth (thank you, Beth!). Her husband got it after being treated at an outpatient surgicenter:





















Now, I don't know about you guys, but I don't find this particularly reassuring. Granted, the word "excellent" is pretty overused these days, but still. They might as well write "Our goal is anything above mediocre care" or "Our goal is to avoid being on Fail Blog." I mean, this is surgery for crap's sake. I don't think "very good," even when all capitalized, sounds especially comforting.

I could probably go on with a whole post about how many resources are wasted on these stupid bracelets, which my kids bring home from school for one cause or another almost every freakin' day. With various shit like "I believe in art class" or "Support your local pencil factory" or "Eat at Rigatoni's House of Overpriced Pasta." They end up all over the floor, and then get tossed in recycling. But I think I'll stop there.

39 comments:

Julie said...

while the pic was loading (and I hadn't read further) I was taking bets with myself that it had something to do with being 'artisnal' ... which may or may not have been better than 'VERY GOOD care' ... not sure ...

aryanhwy said...

They end up all over the floor,

They look like they'd make rather good cat toys. Sort of like the plastic rings from milk jugs (which, alas, one cannot get over on this side of the pond, since our milk comes in cardboard cartons. Our poor cats have been deprived since we moved.)

Leslie said...

It beats "Our goal is not to kill you!" or "Our goal is not to get sued" - just setting expectations!

Anonymous said...

Is it possible the "very good" is meant to be a clever take on the surgery center's name? Maybe it's called Valley Green or Vista Grange or something and they're trying to be alliterative? We have a lot of Bon Secours hospitals here - perhaps they're trying to be literal and translate the center's foreign name. Just trying to look for some symbolism, other than the obvious.

AshleyRN said...

I work in an Emergency Department. Our Customer Service Manager (what that person does other than yell at us if we don't provide a beverage to guests quickly I'll never know) has made "We Look Forward to Providing You Very Good Care" our ER slogan. It's posted right when people come into the lobby. I don't get it and quite honestly I'm a little embarrassed by it.

Fred said...

My hospital has also adopted the "our goal is very good care" mantra. This is the kind of crap that comes out of moronic hospital management focus groups; what a waste of time and resources!

Anonymous said...

I'm betting they aren't using the word excellent care because if you use the word "excellent" you are considered coaching patients into scoring you as such on their CMS patient satisfaction surveys. I manage an inpatient unit, and was told that when I talk to patients I can't say "our goal is to give you excellent care" because we actually could get fined by CMS for using the language in their survey.

Anonymous said...

I think it comes from patient satisfaction surveys- rank us very good or better on everything please... I hate crap like that. And AIDET- ugh! I'm required to say "thank you for choosing Local Hospital for your healthcare needs.". Yeah, because nothing gives patients confidence in their healthcare like corny fast-food rote speeches... Gets mentioned every year on my annual eval. I just won't do it. Ironically, the "so glad Anon was our nurse!" letters that are on the bulletin board aren't mentioned....

Anonymous said...

The "very good" thing is an invention of the Press Ganey medical survey company. The bane of my (and every RNs) existance. "Very good" is their highest score, and they suggest incorporating it into conversations with the patients so they "remember" it when the survey comes in the mail. Doesn't exactly roll off the tongue. And, it's a little insulting to boot.

Anonymous said...

Yeah, and every year on my birthday I get a text message from the bank with VERY GOOD wishes blah blah blah. SOOO sincere!

Anonymous said...

Oh, I get it. Like understated is the new superlative. Real clever. Garrison Keillor was whimsical when he renamed his humble (and then ubiquitous) "supermarket" a more modest "Pretty Good Groceries".

Of course now that so many adults have the brain-power of youngster, it also makes sense to target them with simplistic catchphrases and platitudes. I'd like to have some made for the kids (no idea where they have any fascination with this crap) that say "Clean Your Room" and "Flush the Damn Toilet"- which won't help of course- but pretty soon this crap will be uncool.

Can we start a rumor that these things are recycled colon-constrictors- or how about reused lap bands- then we can see what morons adorn their wrists with 'em...

Anonymous said...

It's because on the Press-Ganey surveys, any score of "very good" or higher gets you into a good percentile as far as patient satisfaction (I can't remember how high...might be the 80th). So some hospitals using the word "very good" repeatedly so that when people fill out their surveys they remember the words "very good."

brent said...

How bout this for their slogan-"Hey, be glad we didn't kill you"

Gracie's Mom said...

So glad I live in Canada. I get excellent care, miserable hospital food and no phoney slogans. Too bad our health care providers and patients aren't treated with more respect by the Health Minister.

gloria p said...

On many surveys "very good" is a death knell for someone in charge. If it's not "excellent" or "outstanding" it's not good enough. Toyota and our travel agency of choice come to mind here.

Anonymous said...

IT IS ENOUGH TO MAKE ME SCREAM ;),
BUT NOT LOOK FOR BIFOCALS

Fred said...

Oh, and its so much more important to get 'excellent' or 'outstanding' service from your car dealership than from your hospital....

Officer Cynical said...

I'm less concerned that "very good" is capitalized than I am that "care" is not.

Scrub Ninja said...

Our ED used to say they wanted to always provide "exceptional" care.

Then someone pointed out that an "exception" is anything different from the norm, so you can't be exceptional all the time. And if your usual standard is quite good, any exception would probably be worse, so exceptional care is exactly what you wouldn't want.

Someone else said that the exact meeting didn't matter because our customers wouldn't think that much.

This reportedly turned into a long and bitter argument, forcing everyone in the marketing department to choose sides, and spawning interminable committee meetings about the subtle minutiae of logic and grammar.

Eventually they decided to forget the whole thing and just follow the Press-Ganey suggestion. So now our slogan is the same as the one in the photo.

rapnzl rn said...

Never have I seen such a blatant attempt to influence Press-Ganey scores....sheesh

MSGMD said...

These sorts of things are very flagrant attempts to coach you on how to fill out your satisfaction survey. The only time I have experienced something more flagrant was when my car salesman literally told me to "be sure to give me a 5 on question 14, okay?"

Anonymous said...

Where can I get the I believe in art class bracelet?

Anonymous said...

What exactly do the Press-Ganey scores accomplish? So now patients are being manipulated to put the "right" answer? Geez.

Anonymous said...

What exactly do the Press-Ganey scores accomplish? So now patients are being manipulated to put the "right" answer? Geez.

Alba said...

i am not a native speaker, so maybe i don't get it.
but my first thought was "isn't 'goal' something you yet want to achieve? as 'in the future'? if your GOAL is very good care, how good is the care RIGHT NOW?"

but how reassuring that they try.

Anonymous said...

HHCAHPS.....because patient satisfaction scores will now be tied to reimbursement.

Library-Gryffon said...

And of course I'm the cranky soul who refuses to fill out patient satisfaction surveys. If I have a problem, I'll call the hospital/clinic/whatever and talk to management. Otherwise, if I'm at the ER/ED/Same Day Surgery, and leave with my problem taken care of, I'm happy. I don't really care if I didn't get a warm blanket within 30 seconds of asking, or the nurse forgot to tell do the "Hi I'm buttercup and I'll be your server today" routine. It's medical care not a hotel or coffee shop!

Gary Oftedahl said...

So let me get this straight--it appears from many of the comments that this is a response to how Press Ganey is crafting their survey results, and we seem committed to influencing our patients (either consciously or subliminally) in whatever way we can that they should respond in a certain way to a survey--which in reality, is nothing more than a pathetic effort on our part to find reasons to pat ourselves on the back.
Am I missing something? Where is there any real patient engagement? Where is there a commitment to addressing the myriad disconnects and fragmented issues confronting us?
I may be cynical (or just Grumpy!!) but first, these surveys do almost nothing to identify real issues, are very costly for organizations, rarely seem to lead to true improvement, and may lead many organizations to "study for the test" (getting a high survey score) rather than addressing the true learning which is needed to really improve care.

Seems the wrist band should say-- "Our goal is Very Good Press Ganey scores"

Anonymous said...

And the scripting isn't limited to just "very good". We're also supposed to incorporate "keeping you informed about wait times" and "concerned about your comfort". Oh, and when we pull an exam room curtain, we are expected to mention that we are "respecting their privacy". All questions on the survey they will receive. We've had countless meetings about this...All the nurses in our unit feel pretty much the same way.... It's nauseating and we won't do it.

Jen in Cincinati said...

I didn't know they were recyclable! Or is that just where they get tossed?

Anonymous said...

Our reviews are based on partly on our press-gainey survey. If our scores aren't where the managers decide they should be, we get docked on our review. Never mind the thing that parents complain about (I work in NICU) are things I have no control over--crowded patient rooms, outdated decor, temperature regulation issues, no lactation consultant available on nights/weekends....but I'll get docked for it. UGH!

Dr. May B. Insane said...

A little bit of a rabbit trail but...a few years back a company that produces feminine products came out with inane slogans such as "Have a nice period". This reminds me of my response which was slightly violent. Ever since then, I've threatened to start my own line of feminine products with slogans but mine would be much more appropriate such as "Try not to kill anyone today!"

Charles said...

Well, at least it didn't read: "our goal is artisanal care"!

Anonymous said...

It's better than the billboard I saw near Kansas City that was advertising a hospital with, "We meet or exceed most health safety standards!" Yeah, that instills me with confidence.

Anonymous said...

Blame Coca-Cola.....they started the dumb slogan trend with "I'm lovin' it", which is grammatically unforgiveable, and makes me want to skewer some MBA with my rapier ..... and drink Pepsi forever.

Grumpy, M.D. said...

I thought "I'm lovin' it" was McDonalds?

Andie said...

I guess they were out of "Our Goal is Mediocre Care" bracelets.

Sherri said...

What about the word "great"? Couldn't the goal be at least "great care"? The fact that this is subliminal language around the patient satisfaction survey makes me heartsick.

cliffintokyo said...

Dr G: McDonalds is the correct answer! Duh!
I think I must have had a bad hair day and it affected my brain.
Sincere apologies to Coca-Cola.
Zero is still my favorite summer beverage....when I'm driving that is.

 
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