Wednesday, August 17, 2011
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A Blog detailing the insanity of my medical practice and the stupidity of everyday life.
Welcome to my whining!
This blog is entirely for entertainment purposes. All posts about patients, or my everyday life, or anything else may be fictional, or be my experience, or were submitted by a reader, or any combination of the above. Factual statements may or may not be accurate. I could be making all this up. I may not even be a doctor. The only true statement on here is that I probably drink more Diet Coke than you do. A lot more.
Singing Foo!
Singing Foo!
Twitter fans- you can follow me @docgrumpy
Cast of Characters:
Annie: My Phenomenal MA
Mary: My Awesome Secretary
Ed: The office fish
Dr. Pissy: The guy I share an office with
Mrs. Grumpy: My Boss (also the world's greatest school nurse)
Frank, Craig, and Marie: The Grumpy Tribe
Garlic and Riley: The Grumpy Dogs
Questions? Comments? Biting sarcasm? Write to: pagingdrgrumpy [at] gmail [dot] com
Note: I do not answer medical questions. If you are having a medical issue, see your own doctor. For all you know I'm really a Mongolian yak herder and have no medical training at all except in issues regarding the care and feeding of Mongolian yaks.
Cast of Characters:
Annie: My Phenomenal MA
Mary: My Awesome Secretary
Ed: The office fish
Dr. Pissy: The guy I share an office with
Mrs. Grumpy: My Boss (also the world's greatest school nurse)
Frank, Craig, and Marie: The Grumpy Tribe
Garlic and Riley: The Grumpy Dogs
Questions? Comments? Biting sarcasm? Write to: pagingdrgrumpy [at] gmail [dot] com
Note: I do not answer medical questions. If you are having a medical issue, see your own doctor. For all you know I'm really a Mongolian yak herder and have no medical training at all except in issues regarding the care and feeding of Mongolian yaks.
Blog Archive
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2011
(616)
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August
(51)
- Today's tip
- Attention patients!
- In the news
- Dear Dr. Whozawhatsit,
- Mary's desk, August 29, 2011
- First day of school
- Maybe she can get a job at Dunkin Donuts now...
- Sunday morning, 1:38 a.m.
- Great sign placement
- Friday afternoon whatever
- Thursday afternoon: 3:49 p.m.
- Great moments in refrigerators
- No matter where you go, there you are
- Crime in America
- Summer Vacation, Day 10
- Summer Vacation, Day 9
- Summer Vacation, Day 8
- Summer Vacation, Day 7
- Breaking medical news!
- Summer Vacation, Day 6
- Summer Vacation, Day 5
- Today's medical advice
- Inventions
- Summer Vacation, Day 4
- "This is the 911 operator, what's your emergency?"
- Summer Vacation, Day 3
- Fly the REALLY friendly skies!
- Summer Vacation, Day 2
- Summer Vacation, Day 1
- Heart of Darkness
- And in today's news...
- Lost her vote, I guess
- Correlation and Causation
- Things that make me grumpy
- Crash course
- Mary's desk, August 9, 2011
- Hole-in-one
- Now THIS game just screams "excitement!"
- It's never a good sign...
- Caring
- Important research
- Random Saturday pictures
- Think, think... Brain blast!
- Annie's desk, August 4, 2011
- Things that make me grumpy
- "Dude! Let's smoke some okra!"
- Doctor talk
- But does it treat syphilis?
- "You want that plain, glazed, or with sprinkles?" ...
- Great moments on rounds
- Sunday afternoon
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August
(51)
13 comments:
To be fair, missing this week's Entourage IS a crime.
The woman sounds to me like the remote is more important than the woman herself. She is remote from the remote.
It never occurred to her to just GET UP and turn on the tv?
Yeesh.
Some years ago the Mayor of Scottsdale Arizona (an upper-class community, or at least that's their self-image) used to call 911 to get driving directions, in her own town.
The clinic I used to work for had an alarm system that was occasionally accidentally set off by employees. After the third time the police came out in response to an alarm they started charging the company for wasting police time...
methinks she needs a referral to Dr. Grumpy for a dementia evaluation!
We've had ads in the paper, showing the picture of a 911 dispatcher, and some superimposed text:
'Yes, sir, your missing Golf clubs are important to me, but I'm handling an armed robbery right now'
Yes, sir, I'll get a unit out to you as soon as I figure out where 'the red house by the park' is'.
The point being: Use 911 properly.
I swear we have a key kidnapper and a sock shyster.
hmm. I am missing a couple of socks. That gives me an idea....
Worse yet is that in an interview on a Colorado TV news broadcast, she said if her remote were missing again she'd call the police again.
I am a 911 dispatcher. We get garbage calls like this all the time. "They put too much rice in my burrito." "Jack in the Box didn't put enough ice in my drink at the drive-thru." "I stubbed my toe and I need an amma-lance." "He won't give me my money back and he won't give me any fresh cigarettes." These are all actual calls that have come into my call center in the past 3 weeks, and they are only a sampling.
Sadly, these are the so-called normal citizens as opposed to the genuinely crazy ones, like the lady who wanted to report a kidnapping -- after calling out the appropriate agencies it became apparent that the baby squirrel she'd seen the past few weeks was now "missing" so clearly it'd been kidnapped.
When I saw the title of this, I assumed you were going to talk about the invasion of calls the Compton police office got recently when a rapper ( Sorry! I don't remember who, as my migraines don't let me get near music!) tweeted that if anyone wanted an internship, they should call a certain number. That number, of course, bring the Compton police station! It was chaos all day! They're calling it a phone flash mob. I think the rapper should face charges! What if there were a real emergency in Compton? (And being Compton, there probably was one!)
What gets me, though, is that the police actually came out and helped her look for it. Did they issue her a ticket for misuse of the 9-1-1 system?
As a police dispatcher, I find her behavior and attitude to be extremely out of line.
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