27 job offers, all of them offering a huge salary, incredible benefits, and infrequent call in places with low crime rates, wonderful year-round climates, great activities, and excellent schools. None of them actually tell you where these places are, of course (they want you to call to find out). Perhaps on the banks of the beautiful river Wah-Hoo?
16 ads for medical education conferences on such topics as "The neurological manifestations of toenail fungus" and "Halitosis- Can you bill extra for putting up with it?"
1 letter to join the U.S. Army reserves, saying the army needs doctors with my skills (yet showing a picture of a guy doing surgery, which definitely ain't my skill).
7 offers to buy "exciting real estate opportunities" in medical office plazas.
8 letters inviting me to seminars on medical billing and coding.
24 ads from drug companies touting the virtues of their now once-a-day drug, which is otherwise identical to their previous twice-a-day drug (now available as a generic, of course) but costs 478% more per pill.
10 ads from financial services people holding "free" seminars at overpriced restaurants to help me manage my money.
5 ads for me to subscribe to journals I've never heard of.
3 ads to buy textbooks, such as "More about chronic back pain than you'll ever want to know, 34th edition."
1 ad from the Grumpyville Ballhogs wanting me to buy season tickets.
And a letter from a patient saying she was firing me for being out of town when she needed to see me.