Wednesday, January 17, 2018


Mr. Snow: "Boy it's freezing out there."

Dr. Grumpy: "Yeah, even just walking from my car to the elevator was bone-chilling."

Mr. Snow: "How does he handle it?"

Dr. Grumpy: "Who? Dr. Pissy? His space is closer to the elevator."

Mr. Snow: "No, your fish. Ed, or whatever his name is."

Dr. Grumpy: "Ed doesn't go outside. He's been in that same spot for almost 20 years."*

Mr. Snow: "Yeah, but I imagine the winter must bother him somehow, like seeing snow out the window. He must get cold in here."

Dr. Grumpy: "Nah, he's fine. The indoor temp here is pretty much the same year-round."

Mr. Snow: "That's weird. I mean, my dog can't stand to go outside when it's this cold. I figured your fish would be the same."

* Ed is not a Betta of unusual longevity. It's just been easier over time to name all of them Ed.


Officer Cynical said...

"We keep the blinds closed so he can't see the snow."

Anonymous said...

Is Ed even near a window?? And what if he thinks it is just a TV and that white stuff doesn't actually happen? Would he have an existential crisis if you opened the window and some came in?

Trying to analyse an office fish's psyche is enough to make you need a neurologist!

Packer said...

All the other Eds died from catching a chill, they call it frozen fish.

ndenunz said...

Whatever you do, don't let him watch "Finding Nemo", he may try and escape!

Astrolabe Silverwax said...

"Now that you mention it, he does always get a little depressed after the International Debutante Ball is over, and he doesn't stop complaining until the summer season starts on the Vineyard."

Moose said...

I am a the Boss of Zoological Offices for the Protection For Fine Fishy Team.

You're clearly not walking your fishy enough. Make sure Ed gets regular walks, a good supply of fishy food, and a fresh bowl of water, every day.

We take these matters very seriously, and if we hear of further issues we may require a visit to ensure Mr Ed Fishy's safety and security.



Jane Lebak said...

Plus, Ed probably has a little submerged tank heater that keeps him at 72 year-round. Ed will be fine. ;-)

Anonymous said...

You should have told the guy that in the summer, to keep Ed from overheating you put ice cubes in his bowl.

C said...

a fish without a bicycle is like.... oh never mind...

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