Wednesday, November 18, 2015

Mary's desk

Mary: "Okay, so we'll see you on Friday, at 1:30. Do you need directions here?”

Mrs. Scan: "No, but what tests will he order on me?"

Mary: "I don't know. He's never seen you before, so it will depend on what he finds when he hears your story and examines you. Every patient is different."

Mrs. Scan: "Well, I really don't want to come in unless I know what he's going to do."

Mary: "I understand, but that's up to him. I'm not the doctor. You'll be able to talk to him about this during the visit."

Mrs. Scan: "Look, I'm not calling you to play games. Either you tell me what tests he's going to order, or I'm going elsewhere."

27 comments:

Anonymous said...

I've said it before and I'll say it again:

Are you *sure* you're not really a psychiatrist?

Anonymous said...

A good example of an idle threat

Anonymous said...

Darn, too bad you lost that customer. /s

Anonymous said...

"I ma not totally sure but it involves a realllly big syringe and a set of tongs," said Mary with a twinkle in her eye.

Anonymous said...

Well? Did she come in?

skidmark said...

Sounds like she's heard the "snap" of a latex glove once too often.

stay safe.

Packer said...

On this one, she is correct. It is called informed consent. It amazes me how often I hear people say that they have no idea what their treatment protocols are.

Anonymous said...

@Packer,

There's nothing wrong with finding out what tests will be run beforehand, but it's a little ludicrous to expect an answer to that question before an examination is even conducted.

Shae said...

Informed consent is one thing, but expecting the receptionist to know what tests the doctor will order for a patient he's never seen before is something completely different. The first is a basic right, the second requires being able to see the future.

Shae said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
bobbie said...

Hopefully for you, she DID go elsewhere!

I hope you buy diamonds for Mary this holiday season!!

Mage said...

LOL...and your notes are truly engaging today.

Stacey Gordon said...

You can't know what tests will be ordered before a history is taken and an actual exam performed. I'd hate for a patient with an aneurysm clip to be sent for an MR of the head.

Anonymous said...

"Frankly, unless you can guarantee me at least one finger up my ass, it's not worth my time and effort."

John Woolman said...

U&E, Glucose, LFTs, B12 & Folate, TFTs, FBC for starters. And the rest for dessert after the main course...

The main course being "listen to the patient, she's telling the diagnosis. And of course, the physical examination as bonne bouche - at the least that gives the neurologist time to think.

Anonymous said...

Dodged a bullet there Doc.

a.generic doc said...

Mary: I can't say for sure, but most of the time, when patients have your problem, he orders an autopsy.

Anonymous said...

"And one more thing- when I come in, I expect him to be wearing a badge."

Anonymous said...

Technically, I understand that Mary is a secretary, albeit an awesome asset to the practice, but, I, for one, would have serious doubts if a secretary was able to pronounce with any certainty what the doctor would be doing.

I mean, as a pharmacy student, I observed open heart surgery from a little platform in back of the patient's head where he was lying on the table, and noted what the anesthesiologist did with the breathing machines and the assistant harvesting the patient's blood vessels from his leg, and I was amazed by the stamina and solitary actions of the cardiothoracic surgeon, with the scrub nurses and others hovering around him.but I don't think my experience would qualify as being able to provide consults to patients anticipating open-heart surgery,

Anonymous said...

How else will she know what to study for?

gena said...

"Listen, lady, I'm a receptionist, not a psychic." Mary needs another raise.

Anonymous said...

"And I need to know ahead of time what the results will be."

Anonymous said...

Our patients want to know what tests the doctor will order so that they can get them done prior to their appointment. While I understand the rational, I as receptionist have no idea what tests the doctor will order for that patient (my psychic skills need improvement). Also, good luck getting the insurance company to pay for the test when the doctor hasn't even examined the patient.

Heidi said...

As a 'front desk administrator" (receptionist) for an Audiologist, I am occasionally grilled for information on hearing test procedures as well as hearing aid info only my professionals can provide. In those instances I have no problem reminding the caller that I answer the phone, and the information they seek is way above my pay grade and then do my best to get them to schedule an appointment (free consult). I do it with a smile and humor when appropriate and it's almost always received well.

If they call with an attitude, or are abusive...that gets handled too. Politely and with diplomacy, of course!

Everyone should have experience manning a front desk (and/or working retail). It can be a real eye opener.

Anonymous said...

Just buy Mary an artisan crystal ball this year for Christmas.

Then she can do her job properly :)

Stacey Gordon said...

While I was in xray school I worked nights at the switchboard in a local hospital. One of the most important things I had to do, was of course, page (read wake up) docs who resented being on call. A patient would call in for a particular doctor, I would check the call list and make the call. The doc would then grill me about the patient's symptoms and asked me if I thought it was really an emergency. I was flattered of course, that they had such high esteem for my medical opinion, but felt it was somehow misplaced.

Anonymous said...

All front desks at every doctor's office deserve major love. We don't get enough!

 
Locations of visitors to this page