A guy out walking his dog went by.
Dog Guy: "What are you looking at?"
Dr. Grumpy: "Those planets."
Dog Guy: (looks up) "Those are planets? Not stars?"
Dr. Grumpy: "Yeah, see how bright they are? And they don't twinkle."
Dog Guy: "Which planets are they?"
Dr. Grumpy: "Looks like... Venus, Jupiter, and Mars."
Dog Guy: "I had no idea they were so close together."
Dr. Grumpy: "That's..."
Dog Guy: "Shit! I bet they're going to collide any day now! I mean, they're really close!"
Dr. Grumpy: "Well, they only look like that from here. They're actually..."
Dog Guy: "Why haven't I seen anything about this on the news? YOU'D THINK A COLLISION BETWEEN GIANT PLANETS WOULD BE SERIOUS! THE ASTEROIDS FROM IT COULD KILL US ALL!"
Dr. Grumpy: "They're really not..."
Dog Guy: "The government knows all about it, I bet, and is covering it up. The media is keeping quiet to prevent a panic."
Dr. Grumpy: "Uh..."
Dog Guy: "Fuck you. You're in it with them. If I hadn't come by when I did, I wouldn't have figured it out either. Let's go, Fluffy."
He picked up his dog and walked away.