Monday, March 4, 2013

Sales call

Dr. Grumpy: "All right, I'd like you to try this medication" (hands over script) "and I'll see you back in a month to see how it works."

Mr. Pulp: (waves script) "Doc, you call this paper? Let me give you my card. My printing company can give you real quality paper for your script pad, not this cheap crap."


Footie said...

He's right of course... what were you thinking!
Brand building is everything!
I keep a variety of stock close to hand. But my spring selection, and I think my favorite, is a pastel, water marked parchment with thread embossing. It has a special cloudy translucency and coveys a certain professional gravitas..
I swear the placebo value of my scripts has risen dramatically since I introduced this line.
Even crazyRx man swoons with delight when it's passed over.
I think we have a business opportunity here.... “Vellum scripts by....”
Let's get in quick before the drug companies rip it off.
What color do neurologists like?

Anonymous said...

"Is it artisan? If not, I'm not interested."

MSGMD said...

If the paper was too nice, the patients might frame it rather than, um, filling it.

thethingspatientssay said...

Wasn't this a line in American Psycho?

Anonymous said...

Why don't you e prescribe?

Grumpy, M.D. said...

I do both.

Laura said...

My father is a runner, and one time in one of the swag bags he got was a pad of paper. He made the mistake of commenting on how nice he thought the quality of paper was. He never lived it down. Whenever someone in my family picks up a pad of paper, we always go "ooo... nice quality paper here" or some variation.
That said, the joke made me starting thinking of the quality of paper I'm picking up, and I recently found myself picking up a pad of paper and thinking it was nice quality in a not sarcastic tone. What I'm saying is, if you pay attention to these things, you notice them, lol.

P.S. My PCP's prescriptions are printed on a very nice quality of paper :p

Anonymous said...

But you can still use Comic Sans, right?

Anonymous said...


You should be writing for a catalog, sort of as Elaine had done on "Seinfeld." I loved your post. Also I love hand made paper. It's artisan alright, but way too nice for a prescription to be written on it.

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