Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Dear Americhoice Healthcare

On your website, you feature this picture under "Our doctors", and I'm honestly not sure what you're trying to say.





1. Our doctors are afraid to show their faces.

2. Our doctors are afraid of getting kicked in the genitalia.

3. Our doctors wear scrubs coordinated to make them look like a roll of Life Savers candies.

4. Our doctors are protesting against the new TSA scanners.

5. You're in good hands with our gynecologists and urologists.

6. We're so germaphobic here that our entire staff wears gowns & gloves.

7. "See no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil, don't touch my crotch."

8. We desperately need a manicure, but are wearing gloves so you don't see.

9. Americhoice pays us so poorly we can't afford clothes.

10. We have glow-in-the-dark scrubs so bright that even the color-blind will notice them.

Thank you, Nicole!

32 comments:

Anonymous said...

10. We all have legs too short for our pants.

Gen said...

My first thought was that they might be supportive of gay rights. Rainbow pants and all.

Old MD Girl said...

Hilarious!

Reuben said...

Looking for more players: Indoor Soccer. Must have own scrubs.

Anonymous said...

Our doctors work so hard we never let them pee.

donna said...

11. After work our doctors are going to rob a bank.
12. Are doctors work in Wake County in N.C and they are too afraid to show themselves

Donna

Kat's Kats said...

Yes. Definitely yes.

shrtstormtrooper said...

Bend it like Dr. Beckham.

AshleyB said...

All of our doctors are white, but in an effort to show diversity, we've cut their heads out of the picture, completely covered the doctors' skin, and dressed them in all different color pants.

Li'l Azathoth said...

In order to maintain their anonymity and prevent them from being able to testify against each other if they're caught, they have color code names. Like in "The Taking of Pelham One Two Three" and "Reservoir Dogs."

Incidentally, note that Dr. Pink and Dr. Orange have their right hands on top, and the other three have their left hands on top. I think it's a secret code. Like Paul's bare feet on the cover of "Abbey Road."

Anonymous said...

You don't see their faces because they're the Residents.

Anonymous said...

From left to right: Dr. Anne Boleyn, Dr. Catherine Howard, Dr. Marie Antoinette, Dr. Georges Danton, Dr. Maximilien Robespierre.

Anonymous said...

Actually some of us are standing with fake arms and and backwards at the same time. If you cannot see this then you are the best choice patient for our healthcare options.

23 Skidoo said...

Don't Touch their Junk or they will have you arrested!

Anonymous said...

Also some of us have only one breast and others might have two, if you look closely.

Anonymous said...

Why are they standing so close together when there's obviously clearance on each side? I don't think they're humans at all, just a shoved together line-up of store dummies.

They're so close together that if they had pockets, no one could tell whose was picking whom's pocket.

Anonymous said...

(Or, whom was picking whose pockets?) or 'whom was picking whose pockets', or whose pocket was being picked by whom?

Anonymous said...

"2. Our doctors are afraid of getting kicked in the genitalia." Funny!

Lo said...

Oh, Dr. G, you always brighten my day but this time you outdid yourself.

I actually hurt myself laughing so hard at #2. Thank you, thank you.

Anonymous said...

11. We will stand tightly together in our anonymity to block all admissions, prevent you from getting expensive unnecessary care, and pay for out-of-network providers.

pharmacychick said...

the one in the middle is getting seriously squeezed out. LOL

Help!

Sandi said...

Looks to me like they're all getting ready to start doing the pee pee dance.



p.s. New reader here. A MT colleague sent me your way. You keep me entertained during the night shift. :)

Anonymous said...

haha, very hilarious.

Anonymous said...

so needed this little laugh after a day of sitting through Health occupation classes. Brain is Fried. This made me laugh HARD!

Lord of the Eeple said...

It's clearly number 9.

Recent telephone calls from a dermatologist I visited half a year ago, combined with the mailed notices from my insurance company and some simple arithmetic, have caused me to conclude that my insurance pays out less than it costs my doctor's office to get them to pay anything at all, and that my doctor would have come out ahead but kept my cost the same if she had given me a 30% discount in exchange for not using my insurance.

Anonymous said...

You missed one:
Our doctors dress to coordinate their pants colors!
(As other commenters spotted)
Or perhaps:
Our doctors are all bug-eyed monsters (so we dare not show their faces)

Bulrush said...

Actually, if you don't show their faces you don't have to get their written permission to use the photo.

And if you use professional models, you usually have to pay them. So not showing faces is a cheap way to get the pics you want.

Anonymous said...

Our doctors have to queue for the restroom because we don't have enough restrooms.

The Mother said...

Our doctors are so ashamed that they are forced to accept minimum wage for their services that they didn't sign the model release?

Phillipia said...

Too funny...thanks for the laugh.

Anonymous said...

definitely looks like they're defending a free kick in soccer.

Anonymous said...

Our doctors do not understand the concept of "personal space".

 
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