Monday, April 2, 2018

House hunting

Mr. Patient and his wife come in. She's staring intently at something on her phone.

Dr. Grumpy: "Hi, folks. Have a seat.  How you been doing, sir?"

Mr. Patient: "Better, that medicine has really helped a lot and..."

Mrs. Patient "Mike, what do you think of the kitchen?" (shows him phone)

Mr. Patient: "Looks fine to me."

Mrs. Patient "I think it's too small."

Voice from phone: "Ma, you'll get used to it. You guys go out for dinner every night, anyway."

Dr. Grumpy: "Um, what's going on?"

Mrs. Patient: "We're thinking of moving to San Diego, and our son is showing us places he's looking at for us on Facetime."

Dr. Grumpy: "So about the new medication, have you had any side effects?"

Mr. Patient: "No, actually I've been... Steven, is that the garage? I need more space than that for my woodworking stuff."

Mrs. Patient: "It's not like you ever use it. I was going to donate it to charity rather than drag it cross country."

Mr. Patient: "The hell you will! I use it more than you use the kitchen."

Voice from phone: "Dad, be reasonable."

Mrs. Patient: "Your father is never reasonable. Haven't you learned that? Mike, answer the doctor's question."

Mr. Patient: "I forgot what it was."

Dr. Grumpy: "Any side effects?"

Mr. Patient: "No. Steven, is there a community pool?"


stacey said...

ADHD meds?

Packer said...

New York is looking better all the time.

Anonymous said...

This is pretty much the reason the pharmacist ignores the patient with the cellphone in their hand. What they got going on in their hand is more important than the task in front of them.

Anonymous said...

But at least the house has cell service, and that's what matters.

Jono said...

Rudeness takes another step in the wrong direction.

Ms. Donna said...

Welcome back! I am sure Annie will be happy to forward this pt record to San Diego.

Loren Pechtel said...

Early dementia, perhaps?

Anonymous said...

Maybe it could be payback for your office keeping them waiting? If not, offer them more time in your waiting room while you see another patient who is ready.

Kimbra Kasch said...

No wonder you're grumpy ;D

greggbc said...

Planning to move TO California is an indication of mental Illness.

clairesmum said...

Cell phone rudeness at any age is not acceptable.
I've had family members do it to me when I am visiting their sick parent/sibling, etc...
home hospice nursing allows you to give(nearly) undivided focus to the needs of patient in front of you - a big plus.
Family members who insist on being present, micromanaging problems via phone, and then have lots of questions that you already answered to the patient....and wants it all repeated, written down, so brother can review with Dr. Google.....
those are times when the duty to the patient, the reality that I am guest in the home/facility, and I am professional......make my brain want to explode!

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