Monday, February 12, 2018


I now present Mary’s list of issues that always seem to plague the last patient seen each day (especially on a Friday).

The last patient of the day:

1. Shows up late, and wants to tell you the 10 minute story of why they're late.

2. Wants to read the HIPAA privacy form word-for-word and ask questions, even though it's identical to the one every other doctor and hospital in the country use.

3. Has a new insurance card and left it at home.

4. Forgot to bring the insurance authorization for the visit, and the doctor who issued it closed early that day.

5. Left their MRI reports/lab reports/small child in the car, has to go back to get them, and has no idea where they parked.

6. Refuses to start the appointment until their spouse/child/parent arrives, and has no idea where they are.

7. Has a new address, needs to fill out the forms for it, and has to call someone to verify what it is.

8. Needs a bunch of prescriptions written, with both 30-day and 90-day scripts written for every one.

9. Shows up late, checks in, then leaves to find a bathroom and is gone another 15 minutes.

10. Somehow manages to lose their phone/sunglasses/corgi in the lobby or exam room and needs you to help them look for it.


jimbo26 said...

Mary needs another raise and I second in favor of . ;-)

bobbie said...

jimbo26 beat me to it!

Poor Mary ~

Jono said...

I'll bet that the patients who are unprepared are even worse!

Packer said...

Oh, stop your kvetching and put yourself in their spot.

1. Their life is a mess.
2. They are ill
3. Is afraid someone is invading their privacy and sharing their medical info
4. In their haste to get to the appointment they left all the importand stuff in the car
Is afraid to face the weekend as two days of unstructured free time will only allow them to spiral out of control.

Anonymous said...

At least phone/sunglasses/corgi has some substance to the 'thing', but some other items, well, not so much, or at at least, anything retrievable.

Anonymous said...

So, this happens in other offices???
We don[t get all of the Friday afternoon terrors. And of course, for us (ultrasound) they have had that swollen leg all week, but now, on Friday afternoon, their PCP needs to know that it really is cellulitis.

Mage said...

I'm so sorry.

Anonymous said...

Packer!! Put yourself in Mary/staff's place!

1. She is tired. Tired of dumb people. Tired of people with messy lives. Tired.

2. She is tired, and maybe ill herself. She has put up with an amazing amount of nonsense all week and needs to get outta there.

3. She may have to pick up a child/grandchild before daycare closes or charges her an exhorbitant amount of money.

4. Do you really think this is the first person she has dealt with all day with similar problems/concerns?

5. She has answered the phone at least a thousand times that day.

6. She has been polite to every person she has encountered that week. She is TIRED. Let her vent in peace!!

Packer said...

Well Debbie, I consider myself corrected. I guess I have a hard time having had 30 years of Friday night calls about it is his weekend with the kids and now he says he is not coming to get them, I had plans, what are you going to do about it ?

My father's maxim rings true: People are jerks ,until they prove otherwise.

Anonymous said...

I used to work Mary’s job. One time I had to escort a patient to the parking garage in an effort to find her car.

Anonymous said...

Well, that escalated quickly!

OldRPh said...

A similar situation is when an "emergency" prescription is presented to us 1 minute before closing. (This means I've already been working for 11 hours and 59 minutes)

"I know you are almost closed but I'm leaving town-the state-the country and I have to have it now, I just ran out, my mother, father, grandparents,Yak just died, my car broke down etc etc..... or someone will die if I don't get this now!"

Me -"I see this was written 2 months ago."

gloria p said...

Mary deserves a fat bonus check EVERY Friday afternoon.

Anonymous said...

Peace, Packer. I get it. I work in a rural health clinic in the middle of the influenza epidemic, plus usual winter stuff. I think I was channeling Mary that day. Yes, by and large, many people are jerks!

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