Mr. Cheech: "Hi, I need to make an appointment with Dr. Grumpy."
Mary: "Okay, we can see you on..."
Mr. Cheech: "I don't have insurance. Does he accept other forms of payment?"
Mary: "Well, we take MasterCard, Visa, AMEX..."
Mr. Cheech: "No, I mean, like, in trade? I grow pot in my shed, and can give you some buds."
Mary: "No, we don't accept payment of that sort."
Mr. Cheech: "It's really high quality, organic. I don't use pesticides or any of that shit."