Thursday, May 2, 2013

Negotiations

Mary: "Dr. Grumpy's office, this is Mary."

Ms. Oxy: "Hi, I need to make an appointment to see Dr. Grumpy."

Mary: "I can help with that. Our next opening is..."

Ms. Oxy: "Wait, before you get to that, I need to know how many Percocets Dr. Grumpy will allow me per month."

Mary: "Did you just ask me..."

Ms. Oxy: "Because my current doc only gives me 150 a month. I'm not going to switch unless you guys make this worth my while. I'm thinking 180 Percocet per month would be enough."

Mary: "Okay, we don't work that way."

Ms. Oxy: "Of course you do. Patients are money to you people, and you need the money. All right, let's say 170 Percocet. I'll settle for that."

Mary: "I think you should stay with your current doctor. It doesn't sound like you're a good match for this practice."

Ms. Oxy: "Okay! 160 Percs a month, and I'll do co-pays in cash, will..."

Mary hung up.

23 comments:

Mad Jack said...

I don't quite know what to think about this one.

C said...

AKA Ms. constipated? Just, uh..how?

PediNP said...

Nice that she put it out there like that. Saved you the time of gathering a history, etc, only to find out what she really wants. No "only dilaudid works for me" or "i had a prescription, but it fell in the toilet".

Ms. Donna said...

Well, well, well. Any referral to Officer Cynical and his or her cohorts.

At least be subtle about your drug shopping!

Patsy said...

I couldn't take 1 Percocet a day and manage to operate a telephone and speak coherently. I was given a few once for a dental infection and had to cut them in half. Even at half a pill I slept for 12 hours.

Mrs J said...

I'm thinking ms oxy was cut off from her very generous Dr and now she's desperate. She also must have been high to think there would be any other answer but no way and here's the number to rehab! It is never a good idea to start off your phone call by requesting Percocet in large quantities, especially when you haven't stated the medical problem

Packer said...

Cash co pays----hmmmmmm, how is tomorrow ?

And when I meet some really screwed up kid, I start thinking about how many drugs their parents must have taken. I know they say I am wrong, but I just can't help but going there.

bobbie said...

Way to go, Mary!!!

Affan Qadri said...

Send her to rehab

MDB said...

I remember one patient that was driving us at the pharmacy and her neurologist nuts. Despite directions for her Lidoderm patches of 1 patch on for 12 hours and then off for 12 hours #30 she would blow through all of them in about a week. She would put 2 of them on and then take one off and replace it immediately. She switched neurologists twice after they caught on to what she was during and told us not to refill early and wouldn't write scripts for more.

I also remember a guy coming in to fill a script for his girlfriend and wants to pay cash for 120 percocet, 1 tab three times a day as needed. We ran medicaid which we had on file and low and behold we get a rejection for too soon, just filled for #150 30 day supply (1 tablet 5 times day as needed) a week prior at another pharmacy 30 minutes away by a different physician. Calling the doctor's office got the prescription cancelled as she told them she was completely out and the script they wrote was on the same day she filled the first script.

Loren Pechtel said...

Yup, refer to Officer Cynical.

The Evil Receptionist said...

See, this is where our office would have gotten her demographic info and added her to our "Do Not Schedule EVAR!" list. Because you KNOW she's going to call back and try again with a different story.

MSGMD said...

Unfortunately I have been unable to find any law enforcement agency (FDA, local police, FBI) who gives a *&%$ about this kind of crap when I have contacted them about patients like this...

clairesmum said...

When they talk about "empowered consumers of health care" I don't think this is what the policy makers and program planners had in mind!

Maggiepie said...

Mary, you should have let her make an appointment. That way, you, Annie and Dr. Grumpy would get a chance to see the balls on that woman.

Anonymous said...

Sounds like she tried to broker a deal, eh? I wonder what were her customers going to pay.

Old RPh said...

The sad (and maddening) part is that she will eventually find a prescriber to write that prescription and a pharmacy that will fill it.
MSGMD - look online for your local DEA diversion office.

jen said...

o.O

gena said...

"157 Percocets is my FINAL offer. Take it or leave it."

Yeah, file this under how NOT to become a new patient in a doctor's office.

Charles said...

"Mary hung up."

Yep, that is sometimes the best way to handle some folks.

Jen in Cincinnati said...

Drug seekers seem funny but please remember the many many more people who are legitimate pain management patients. People who need long term treatment for chronic pain do become tolerant to lower doses and often need to take doses that would knock out others who are not adjusted to these meds. They may also become dependent but they are not addicts nor drug seekers.

Anonymous said...

was she calling from jail or the back of a police car???

Anonymous said...

jen, the sad part is.. these people with 'fantastic tolerances' are the people i code, on a weekly basis, when the admitting doc buys how much they take... legit 'pain pts' RARELY show up in my ed. (we can kinda tell)

 
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