Dr. Grumpy: "How much vodka do you drink now?"
Mr. Astalt: "Maybe a quart per day."
Monday, April 4, 2011
Party on, dude
Dr. Grumpy: "How much vodka do you drink now?"
Mr. Astalt: "Maybe a quart per day."
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Mr. Astalt: "I used to be a heavy drinker, like 1 or 2 full bottles of vodka a day. But I want to be healthy, and don't do that anymore."
Dr. Grumpy: "How much vodka do you drink now?"
Mr. Astalt: "Maybe a quart per day."
A Blog detailing the insanity of my medical practice and the stupidity of everyday life.
Dr. Grumpy: "How much vodka do you drink now?"
Mr. Astalt: "Maybe a quart per day."
Welcome to my whining!
This blog is entirely for entertainment purposes. All posts about patients, or my everyday life, or anything else may be fictional, or be my experience, or were submitted by a reader, or any combination of the above. Factual statements may or may not be accurate. I could be making all this up. I may not even be a doctor. The only true statement on here is that I probably drink more Diet Coke than you do. A lot more.
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Note: I do not answer medical questions. If you are having a medical issue, see your own doctor. For all you know I'm really a Mongolian yak herder and have no medical training at all except in issues regarding the care and feeding of Mongolian yaks.
Cast of Characters:
Annie: My Phenomenal MA
Mary: My Awesome Secretary
Ed: The office fish
Dr. Pissy: The guy I share an office with
Mrs. Grumpy: My Boss (also the world's greatest school nurse)
Frank, Craig, and Marie: The Grumpy Tribe
Garlic and Riley: The Grumpy Dogs
Questions? Comments? Biting sarcasm? Write to: pagingdrgrumpy [at] gmail [dot] com
Note: I do not answer medical questions. If you are having a medical issue, see your own doctor. For all you know I'm really a Mongolian yak herder and have no medical training at all except in issues regarding the care and feeding of Mongolian yaks.
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20 comments:
That's a big improvement!
As a side note, I have been continually impressed by the volumes of EtOH patients are able to drink. 2 bottles?? That's totally astounding.
And on the occasions that he drinks wine, he only has one glass. He fills this one up: http://www.vat19.com/dvds/bottle-of-wine-glass.cfm
I still think people are trying to wind me up when they tell me volumes of alcohol like that. Hats off to them, they have remarkable bodies to be able to cope with that for even a short period of time. After one day I'd have alcohol poisoning and would be gone.
Such restraint!!!
Wowser!! My late father was an alcoholic but I don't think he ever drank that much in one day. (hmmm, how many ounces in a quart again?) Of course, nothing he could do would have made him healthy, he had cluster headaches, cancer & Chron's later in life but after that week-long black out he did scale back his drinking.
haness - well, he's trying to harness his drinking but...
You learn something new every day around here. I had to Google AST/ALT.
Mr. Mobius -- They're "remarkable bodies" adapted by long practice. I don't think any alcoholic starts out there. (Disclosure: I'm a recovering alcoholic, and I managed to drink for some years at a level that would've knocked my husband flat out...)
wv: [ex]scesive!
Wow, that's MUCH better!
As a new nurse I was told to assume that people will usually admit to drinking half of what they really do.... WOW! what a liver!!!
"But then again, maybe not."
"This morning, for instance, I had a quart for December 5, 1281, one for February 9, 1532, and one for August 6, 3249 BC. But considering that the Earth is 1,643,000,000,000 days old, I'm still WAY behind."
A friend's boyfriend can drink that much, easy. It isn't pretty. He can drink two pitchers of beer and three or four mex restaurant margaritas. Then go home and drink a whole bottle of scotch and some tequila. Of course, he never remembered any of it.....
I have been amazed at the degree of neurological disease in people that are long term alcoholics. The lasting slurring and tremoring seem a ton worse than other drugs. Of course people can drink heavily longer than people can shoot up meth....don't think the meth heads live long enough to have real lng term problems.
Who are we to judge? LOL
Her poor poor liver.
Neighbor died last year at 61, a hard death it was, from years of drinking. The only good thing about it was that my teenage son got to witness first hand the effects, for he and I would have to pick him up off the floor a couple of times per week and get him into bed. My son started helping me do that when he was 15 because physically I was not able to do it so easily. He was a self medicating chronic depressive. He would still be alive if he had treatment.
My father's alcoholism can be traced to self-medicating. I know that he was abused at least emotionally by his mother. I'm not sure who abused him sexually.
My second husband was self-medicating bipolar depressing with alcohol. He was a binge drinker and wasn't sure if he'd have to never drink again or be able to drink socially. He found that he could drink socially by finding a few people (including me) that he would listen to who were able to cut him off.
He eventually got to a point where he was able to do this himself most of the time but never drinks without someone with him. Unfortunately, this is very very rare. Given the propensity for addiction when a parent has alcoholism I watch myself closely for addiction to anything (food, actions etcetera) and have spoken about it to my children as well.
I find it interesting that studies have shown people with bipolar disorder often (don't recall the percentage) have alcoholism in their immediate family.
blecus - how one feels the morning after drinking without alternating alcohol and water, especially with no food on the stomach.
Could this be a misunderstanding? Instead of "a quart", how about "a quarter"?
I like the guy's name.
I'm going to nitpick: Technically his name is inaccurate as EtOH depletes pydridoxine/B6 and thus suppresses ALT production, for which B6 is a cofactor (hence the classic AST to ALT ratio of at least 3-to-1 in alcoholics).
I believe it.... especially after the following conversation had with a patient when I was an intern at a pharmacy chain:
Pt: I really don't know if I want to fill this prescription for naproxen that my doctor wrote for me for my pain. I did some looking up on the internet and I'm concerned about the side effects. I also saw that there is an interaction with alcohol.
Ms. Intern: It seems you're concerned about side effects and the possible interaction between naproxen and alcohol. How much alcohol would you say you drink in a week?
Pt: Oh, not that much at all.
Ms. Intern: Well, how many times a week would you say you drink?
Pt: Maybe four, five, six nights a week.
Ms. Intern: And how many beverages do you drink each night that you drink?
Pt: Oh, I don't know. Maybe fifteen, twenty, twenty-five on the weekend nights. (Laughs) Not a lot, y'know.
Ms. Intern: So you consume roughly 60 to 100 beers a week?
Pt: Well geez, when you say it like that, you make it sound bad.
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