Monday, August 1, 2022

Saturday night, 8:24 p.m.

Dr. Grumpy: "This is Dr. Grumpy, returning a call."

Mrs. Cartography: "Hi, I'm sorry to bother you on a weekend, but I'm on vacation and I guess I forget to bring my Fukitol pills."

Dr. Grumpy: "Okay, do you have a pharmacy you want me to call it to? Where are you?"

Mrs. Cartography: "I'm in Hawaii, in... hang on. It says this is Lahaina. Do you know a pharmacy here?"

Dr. Grumpy: "No but let me..."

Mrs. Cartography: "My phone says there's a Dumpster Drug in Honolulu. Can you send it there?"

Dr. Grumpy: "Yes, are you going there soon?"

Mrs. Cartography: "It wasn't planned, but I can if I need to. We have a rental car."

Dr. Grumpy: "Honolulu is on another island. You're on Maui."

Mrs. Cartography: "I know Hawaii is an island. I'm not stupid."

Dr. Grumpy: "It's several islands, and Lahaina and Honolulu aren't on the same one. Let me look up a pharmacy in Lahaina for you, hang on..."

Mrs. Cartography: "Well, I'd rather go to Dumpster Drugs, because I use them back home. Why don't you just call it in and we'll drive there tomorrow?"

Dr. Grumpy: "You can't drive from Lahaina to Honolulu."

Mrs. Cartography: "I'm sure you can, there must be bridge or something. I mean, that's what I do when I'm going to Brooklyn."

Dr. Grumpy: "It's not quite the same. Let me..."

Mrs. Cartography: "Oh, never mind. My husband found the Fukitol bottle in my purse. Have a good weekend, doctor."


Ygolonac said...

You can too drive from island to island, you just need to build upa good head of steam first.

Check YubTub for videos of rednecks skipping snowmobiles across small rivers and lakes - they succeed more often than not. (And they fail often enough that Montana had to outlaw the practice. :V )

I mean, how d'you think Magnum got around when T.C. was busy or the chopper was deadlined? You *did* rent the Ferrari, didn't you?

Bedřich Fuzzybank said...

"A guy in front of our hotel who said he's a Disney employee sold us a stay at Aulani on Oahu, and he also said he's sending a bus to take us there."

Anonymous said...

So when do you open your travel agency? It is such an obvious sideline to yak herding.

BobF said...

Must have been a very long drive on that bridge from the west coast.

stacey said...


Packer said...

Stacy I don’t think you meant oh fiddle-faddle sister did you? Hey Doc what do you call that condition ? I don’t think that’s neurological.

gloriap said...

Here's another person who should not leave the house, much less the mainland.

Anonymous said...

"I usually drive through the East River, but sometimes it's quicker to cut through the harbor."

Anonymous said...

Maybe he left his smarts in another time zone?

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