Monday, February 20, 2017

Memories...

One of the other residents I trained with (a long time ago, in a hospital far, far, away) was Dr. Tree. He was argumentative and irritating (in short, a pretty typical neurologist). He didn't usually speak to the rest of us, which was a good thing.

Anyway, one day a few of us (both boys and girls) were hanging around in the neurology residents office, bullshitting about random stuff while we waited for rounds to start. Dr. Tree was at his desk, reading some neuro textbook and ignoring us.

At some point we began joking about porn. I have no idea what led to that. This went on for a few minutes, when suddenly Dr. Tree slammed his book closed, came over, and yelled the following diatribe at us:

"You think it's funny! It's NOT funny! The problem with porn is that it gets so out of control! You start with a dirty magazine, then you move into books and movies. You keep needing more and more, and the tame stuff isn't good enough anymore, so you need filthier and filthier, harder-core stuff! It's like a snowball rolling downhill, and YOU CAN'T DO A FUCKING THING TO STOP IT!"

Dr. Tree abruptly stopped and turned red. The rest of us, somewhat taken aback and unsure what to say, looked at him silently.

After a pause he mumbled "Um, at least that's what I've heard."

He picked up his book and ran out of the room.

16 comments:

jimbo26 said...

Roflmao , oh dear Dr Tree .............................

Anonymous said...

Wait, what? Terry Crew was a neurology resident?

Officer Cynical said...

In my experience, Dr. Tree was correct.

Packer said...

Apparently , he was not really ignoring you, for he heard every word. But you all wouldn't include poor Tree in your "cool Docs crew". Then one foggy Christmas Eve,Santa came to say.......

Anonymous said...

Are you sure that was a neurology textbook he was reading?

Anonymous said...

Not being into porn, I think I'm glad I did not know anything about what Dr. Tree was ranting about. It certainly gave a window into his mind, though.

Anonymous said...

So what do you think is in HIS office's "lost and found" drawer?

evodevo said...

Typical case of projection LOL

Old RPh said...

Dr G.
Some of your readers comments are hilarious. I would like to be able to give the best a thumbs up. Any chance of updating your site??

Ms. Donna said...

"The lady doth protest too much, methinks . . ." Well, in this case Dr. Tree.

And Anonymous 3:32, I don't want to go there . . .

Anonymous said...

Well, if you have to go out on a diatribe, it may as well be ...

Bob Culp said...

Officer Cynical and I are in the same boat. It's been my experience that what Dr. Tree ranted about was pretty spot on except the bit about not being able to stop it. Like most other addictions, it starts with the decision to quit.

Anonymous said...

I think he's onto something

Tarquin "R.J." Toffeebridge V said...

"...and then you start with the hand puppets..."

Anonymous said...

"...and before you know it, the stuff that will get you off is only available below the counter at this one store on the Reeperbahn in Hamburg, and you have to fly there once a month to buy it, because this story probably takes place before the web was a thing..."

Anonymous said...

He's the one they call Dr. Feelgood.

 
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