Monday, October 22, 2012

Skool Nerse Time

Ms. Concern: "Hello?"

Mrs. Grumpy: "Hi, this is Nurse Grumpy, the school nurse at Douglas C. Kenney Elementary School, calling about your daughter, Karen."

Ms. Concern: "Yes?"

Mrs. Grumpy: "She took a bite of a friend's sandwich at lunch, and it had peanuts in it. Karen swelled up really badly, and had trouble breathing. I used one of our emergency EpiPens on her. She's much better now, and resting in my office."

Ms. Concern: "Okay. Do I need to send someone to get her?"

Mrs. Grumpy: "Yeah, but I went looking through her medical forms here. Did you know she's seriously allergic to peanuts?"

Ms. Concern: "Oh, yeah, she's been that way since she was five."

Mrs. Grumpy: "But on the allergy form you filled out just 2 weeks ago you wrote 'no allergies'!"

Ms. Concern: "That's because I don't have time for school paperwork."

Mrs. Grumpy: "Well, it really helps to have an accurate medical history, for when things like this happen."

Ms. Concern: "Her pediatrician knows, and I know. Why does it have to be your business, too?"

Mrs. Grumpy (sigh): "Do you have an EpiPen for her at home?"

Ms. Concern: "Of course. I keep two of them here."

Mrs. Grumpy: "Well can you please bring one to school? So we have it available in case this happens again?"

Ms. Concern: "They both expired years ago."

48 comments:

Anonymous said...

Did your wife report her? That poor kid is going to die.

Wendy said...

Isn't that criminal negligence?

Anonymous said...

She doesn't like here daughter very much if I read the signs correctly...

Anonymous said...

Makes one wonder if this child has an unusual life insurance policy for a child...

instant student said...

I am surprised Karen made it past the age of five with this mother.

jimbo26 said...

" Will you have time to organise your daughters funeral ? "

Anonymous said...

Yeah, I want this to be funny but it feels like it's tantamount to child abuse, at the very least criminal neglect. I'd love a daughter, and I can make time to fill out forms and update EpiPens.

Anonymous said...

Another village is missing their eeeedjit! Experience has taught me that trying to talk some sense into Mommy's head will just result in yourself having a headache! She will NEVER have time to do the right thing and will ALWAYS know best...and she KNOWS that she knows best. Just like eeedjits driving with their toddlers standing on the front seat without any form of restraint ("I will use my arm to stop them from going through the windscreen if we are involved in an accident". May the guardian angels be alert at all times!

Library-Gryffon said...

It does sound like at a minimum a call into the child's pediatrician is in order.

As well as a call to CPS/DCF/your-state's-alphabet-soup-child-protection-agency.

Ami said...

Oh. My. God.

I had a little guy in my program a few years ago who was allergic to just about everything in the universe, and had an epi pen for him. I went to two trainings and perused the internet, talked to a couple nurse friends and generally freaked out... over a child I was responsible for two hours a day. (never had to use the pen, he did fine... but it was DAMNED important!!)

This child's mother can't be bothered to let the school know?

Or maybe that should be "mother."

Kim said...

I have sent my son to school with chapstick, cough drops and hand sanitizer and told him not to tell anyone he had them because I didn't want to deal with filling out medication paperwork because I think it's stupid to fill out medication paperwork for chapstick, cough drops and hand sanitizer. However, if he had an allergy it would be noted and of course the school would have an EpiPen on hand for him! Geeez.

Dr. Minerva said...

This is in stark contrast to the mother who demanded 8 epi-pen double packs for her 16 year old. One for home, one for school, one for sports, one for grandma's house, and presumably one for church, and three friends houses. When I talked to the pediatrician the child had never had to use one. But, hell, insurance covered them!

Lizzie LVT said...

Next time call an ambulance, maybe that will get through to "mom" that her daughter could have DIED from this.

There's certain people in this world that cost me sleep when I have to send a cat home with them. I couldn't imagine having to send a child home with one of them.

C said...

*bangs head on wall*

Packer said...

The field for Mother of the Year award has just narrowed.

Karen Henry said...

face plant

Mary said...

Wow! We have a significant number of kids "over diagnosed" with peanut allergies around here. They have an epi-pen and a peanut free classroom, despite the fact that they have NEVER had a problem and just had a positive skin test. (one kid admitted to eating PB just before the testing without any issue). Allergist group notifies schools and puts fear in everyone....this kid NEEDS that kind of notification and it does not happen. Something is wrong!!

EDNurseasauras said...

Document, document, document.

Ms. Donna said...

Oh My. And my son has asthma, and you should have seen the forms and hoops we had to jump through to keep his rescue medication in the nurse's office @ school.

Could my son keep them on his person? OH NO! They're D-R-U-G-S!!!!!!

Then the nurse was not there all day (budget cutbacks) so NOBODY was allowed to touch the DRUGS to save his life.

Gave the boy a (highly illegal) cell phone w/ my number programmed in and told him to call me if he felt tight. Also told him that if he got caught using the phone to do anything except call me, he was a dead person walking.

And they wonder why mothers get gray hair?

danielle said...

Mother of the year award.....is this child endangerment? Or at least a phone call to the pediatrician....guess this is one mom who thinks her kids are replaceable

Anonymous said...

echo everyone's comments on here.

Side note: Google searches for "Douglas C. Kenney Elementary School" reached an all-time high today as people search for the true identity of Dr. Grumpy.

Silliyak said...

Mom's busy trying to get the deer Crossing signs moved

bobbie said...

Library-Gryffon ~ AMEN!!

Anonymous said...

Mine has "the" peanut allergy - so bad it's now published. And I'm a paramedic. So I just. can't. imagine.

Anonymous said...

As a pediatric intensivist, these kids are the ones that just infuriate me to see. Of course it is abusive, under the category "medical neglect." I would definitely contact the child protective services and the pediatrician. God help that poor child.

RSDS said...

My Dad once had an Epipen. It expired.

Could he get a refill? NO.

Could he get a new prescription for one? NO.

The one that has expired, that is all the Epipen that you are allowed!

Maybe the mother had run into the same stonewall.

C. said...

My bf is in law enforcement. The number of people that do stupid things just like this (and far worse) on a daily basis in one county is astounding. I work with CPS and they wouldn't touch this. When compared to selling a kid for crack, an epi pen is a non issue.

Anonymous said...

RSDS - I think your dad can get a new EpiPen, but the way it works for me is that no prescription lasts longer than one year (at least, that's how it works in my state), and the doctor then usually wants you to have an appointment with him/her before a new prescription is written. For life-long allergy issues, I think this whole thing is absurd, and an exception ought to be made for Epi-Pens, and until then, that's why I am typically walking around with an expired Epi-Pen. But I am an adult and assume the risk. I certainly don't condone this behavior in parents whose kids have severe allergies.

Anonymous said...

Kim, I agree with you 100% and I am a teacher. As long as they are not sharing I don't have a problem with it. However, schools have a 0 tolerance and if your child is caught he/she will be suspended. The same w/knifes. I had the sweetest, amazing, smart, well behaved, great home, etc., child who was so excited that she packed her own lunch. She proceeded to tell me what she had....sandwich, carrots, celery, kiwi and some pretzels. She continued to tell me she even remembered the knife to cut her kiwi. I said, I will take that knife and cut the kiwi. Please don't ever bring one to school again. Either ask mom or your brother to help you b/f you leave or ask me and I will do it for you. I put the knife (a very dull butter knife) in my purse and called the mom. I said, "K, everything is FINE! PROMISE! However, you need to take your lunch now, and come to school and pick something up. I will explain when you get here. But please come now and when you sign in just tell them we have a meeting NOT that your picking something up!" She came 10 minutes later, I handed her the knife and it was never spoke of again. Had she taken the knife out of her lunch bag and another teacher saw it she would have been minimally suspended w/ the possibility of expulsion. I DIDN'T MAKE THE RULES. I JUST HAD TO ENFORCE THEM. I think there needs to be some "teacher discretion!" And I recall who was in the lunchroom that day and she would have been expelled; a first grader who wanted to cut her Kiwi! She's (Ms J, did on the lunchroom with a Kiwi) actually a Police Officer on the West Coast now. I would do the same w/ cough drops too (unless the child had a health condition). Some of the rules were crack ass crazy! AGAIN, I DON'T MAKE THEM, I JUST HAD TO FOLLOW THEM!

The Evil Receptionist said...

*headdesk*

My little guy used to have to have Diastat on hand at school.(Thank God they never had to use it) The nurse thanked me for filling out the proper forms--and when I asked her why *she* was thanking *me*---you guessed it: another child in the building was prescribed it and the nurse didn't even know the child had a history of seizures, much less that he needed Diastat.

Debbie said...

For those of us who work in the health care field, these types of encounters are all too frequent. The negligent, the stoopid, the ignorant...yep, those are our people. Sigh.

Anonymous said...

As a former social work professor had said many years ago, "one needs to have a license just to legally go fishing, yet most anyone can become a parent." How ironic and how sad that this child was not worth the few minutes it would have taken for her Mom to have completed a form.

Visiting peds intensive care is also time consuming.

gloria p said...

"Why does it have to be your business?"
As a minimum, because she spends 8 hours a day under our care, you fool. And she's careless enough to eat food she knows she's allergic to.

Charles said...

Reminds me of a case a home health aid friend told me about:

A grandmother had her two little grandsons at home, both were prescribed sleep apnea monitors. But, every time my friend visited the grandmother would tell her, "no, I don't use them 'cause they are always going off!"

doh!

When adults are this stupid I really don't care; but, when there are children involved, who cannot handle things for themselves, it is really sad.

RehabRN said...

Grumpy:

I went to school in the dark ages when 1) you could go home at lunch and 2) you could carry your inhaler around with you on your person.

Very convenient if you started to wheeze after all that running at recess.

Sometimes I scratch my head nowadays, but from what the school nurse at Bubba's tells me, I'd probably have some self-defense items in my desk if it were legal.

Ugh!

The Bus Driver said...

Growing up with asthma, I was in middle school when my mom gave me my inhaler, and told me to keep it in my bag. I was not to tell anyone cuz of the stupidity of the school system. In highschool- i carried a bottle of advil for pain relief, in secret, of course, after the nurse couldnt hand out advil anymore.

One time on the bus, we had a child with an asthma attack. There happened to be a police officer behind us, the regular driver went back to tend to the child, and i flagged down the officer... who called an ambulance promptly. Then I contacted the bus shop to get the parents phone numbers so i could call them to come get the boy and let them know the ambulance was tending to their child. I called the number, and the father called me back. His exact words to me after i had told him that the AMBULANCE was treating his kid... was ..... "So.. Do i need to come get him???"....

Uh YES?!

emily said...

I'll bet your wife needs a drink with dinner.

Anonymous said...

My kiddo just got diagnosed with asthma with bronchitis. She needed an inhaler at school at noon for 10 days routinely, and every 2 hours as needed. I did all the paperwork and talked to the skewl "nurse" and her teacher. Kiddo got her inhaler as scheduled twice. Because "it's the child's job to remember.". She is SIX and its new. Thank god she's recovered without ever truly needing the prn... Of course, it turns out only 2-3 kids turn their weekly homework in too. (out of 24.). Apathy all around. So sad.

Tee said...

Holy hell! I really hope Mrs. Grumpy reported this dingbat of a mother! Good grief, way to kill your kid!

Renee Maynes said...

And this sums up why I have never coveted nor applied for a job as a school nurse. Luckily, so far, I've had mothers more intent on getting their children epi-pens they have no medical indication for, rather than mothers who think making sure their kid doesn't die of an allergic reaction is someone else's problem.

RehabRN said...

Anonymous Anonymous said...
My kiddo just got diagnosed with asthma with bronchitis. She needed an inhaler at school at noon for 10 days routinely, and every 2 hours as needed.


Dear Anon:

If you'd check, you'd see that the average school nurse has several HUNDRED children assigned to him/her daily.

I'm freaking out if I have more than 6 sick puppies.

If Little Darling really needs her nebs q2hrs, she prolly needs to stay home to get well. (I would not send my kid if Bubba needed them q2...that's sick in my book)

If she's running around and having fun, being quiet and doesn't ask for the prn or tell anyone she feels sick, most likely, she feels okay.

Give the school nurse a break!

Morris said...

::headdesk::

I'd make a bet that same mother would be the first to sue if something happened to her daughter - along the lines of the school not taking due care, even though it's her who is guilty of criminal neglect (IMO). People like this make my head come close to exploding.

Anonymous said...

I'm sick kid mom- child stayed home for 5 days, when she went back to school, child needed her inhaler (not neb) once a day. Office and teacher said they would call said young child down once a day for 10 days. They didn't. Q2 was only prn and I expected child to say if she needed it. 15 days is a LOT of school. If school had said they wouldn't do it, child would have been home. Issue was they SAID no problem.

Anne said...

That is so insane. Doesn't mom know what can happen? Or does she just not care?
Our own peanut allergy story - We sent our 5 year old off to day camp this summer, and I think it was day 2 when we got a very angry phone call from his counselors "Why didn't you tell us he was allergic to peanuts?!?" Um he'd never been before. I'm about to panic, thinking my kid has swelled up like a balloon, but no, he had just told the counselors that he was allergic, because he doesn't LIKE peanut butter, and they were following up on that. All was explained, and we laughed about it, but I'm pretty sure for a few minutes we were up there with that mom in the counselor's mind.

Tammy said...

My guess is the "someone" she would send would be the friendly neighbourhood taxi driver. How much longer does it take to write "peanut allergy" than "no allergies" on a form?!? Scary parenting fail.

Anonymous said...

@Anon: re: Doug Kenney. Don't waste your time, this was an in-joke to see if there were any Caddyshack/Animal House fans lurking.

Yes to both Doc.

Anonymous said...

If she was having an allergic reaction bad enough to use the Epipen, shouldn't the ambulance have been called? I thought Epipens were meant to "buy some time" and people might get their symptoms back after it wears off.

Anonymous said...

If evolutionary theory is correct, the child of this woman will not live long enough to reproduce so her genes won't be passed along. Nature is cruel.

 
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