Friday, May 22, 2009

Family Fun

Part of taking a patient's story down is getting a family history. This is often skipped by docs in a hurry, but can be quite helpful in looking for the odd genetic disorder. So I still try to do it on each new patient.

Sometimes, though, you can get some mighty weird answers. So, to help you enjoy the 3 day weekend, here are a few from my archives.

"My mom had diabetes, but only when she was alive."

"Both my grandmothers got menopause. My mom may have it, too."

Dr Grumpy: "Any major illnesses in your family?"
Mr. Bozo: "No, but my Dad was a Lieutenant".

"My mom died of liver cirrhosis. Nobody knows how she got it, because she never smoked a day in her life."

"My brother has diabetes. I think it's gestational diabetes."

"My mom is 80 and healthy as a horse, except for her lung cancer."

"My grandparents were from Norway, or maybe Germany, or it could have been England. You know, one of those Russian countries."

"My parents are both fine, but my goldfish has been sick."

"My father died of uterine cancer".

"Family illnesses? Hell, Doc, I don't even know my Mom's last name anymore. She changes it all the fucking time".


Julie said...

Wadda I think, funny. I love some of the answers I get from patients. Just found your blog and it looks like my type of humor.

ERP said...

I love when I ask "Anyone in your family have heart disease or a heart attack?" and they say, "yeah, my wife".

The Bus Driver said...

LOL too funny!

Jaded Pharmacist said...

Think had me think back of my rotation in a hospital shadowing a trauma team. I remember reading the admission entries, including HPI/course of events. In my 5 weeks there, we saw:
- a man "minding his own business" when he was pushed out of a 2nd story window (alcohol involved - shocker)
- a woman who managed to run over herself with her own car; never figured the logistics on that one
- and not one, but TWO patients admitted after being bucked off their mules. Alcohol was involved here too...

And thanks for commenting on my blog!

Uro*MA said...

The fave in our office is when the wife of a patient calls to say they need to get their husband "fixed"/ The husband calls and says he needs a hysterectomy. yeah they both happen about once a week, gotta love it!

ayla said...

Oh I cant't stop laughing should know better.

Anonymous said...

haha I thought the Lieutenant joke was funny. Though maybe its because I grew up in the airforce

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