Modern life

Dr. Grumpy: "What have you been up to?"

Mr. Home: "I took my blood pressure this morning. Then I took my pills and had a BM. These days that's keeping busy."

Phone calls

I'm with a patient when Mary knocks to say there's an ER doctor on hold for me.

Dr. Grumpy: "This is Dr. Grumpy."

Doctor Er: "Oh, crap, I didn't think you'd pick up so fast. Hey I need to talk to you about one of your seizure patients."

Dr. Grumpy: "Sure. What's up?"

Doctor Er: "It's a guy, I think in his 40's, he's on one of those newer seizure meds? He says he hasn't seen you for about a year?"

Dr. Grumpy: "Do you have a name?"

Doctor Er: "I, uh, don't have the chart in front of me. He takes an epilepsy medication? Does that sound familiar?"

Dr. Grumpy: "It could be quite a few patients. Do you have a date of birth?"

Doctor Er: "Honestly, I figured I'd be on hold for a few minutes, so I'm not at the computer. Actually, I'm sitting on the can right now. How about I call you back in a few minutes when I'm done?"

Dr. Grumpy: "That's fine."

Doctor Er: "Thanks."

(click)

Quarantine day whatever - seen in our fridge

Stand-up COVID comedy

Today Marie and I went out for a walk.

After several blocks we came to a police crew cleaning up an intersection from an accident. The damaged cars were already gone, but there were a few guys sweeping up car debris and measuring distances.

One officer was filling out paperwork and Marie asked him what happened.

Without looking up he said "someone coughed on the road, that's all."

"Uh, no thanks, I don't want that either"

Yet another not-so-thought-out healthcare worker appreciation idea:

Thank you, M!

Strange substitutions

No idea how the store's shopping software thought these were equivalent, but here ya go:

Thank you, H!