Doctor Grumpy in the House

Due to various amounts of family junk this weekend, I'm re-posting this from a while back. As my regular readers know, I moonlight as a ...

Words fail me. Just read it. Thank you, Deborah!

Dr. Grumpy: "What do you do when you feel a migraine coming on?" Mrs. Hazard: "Exercise helps. I do some stretching and jog ...

My cell phone rings. It's the hospital ID. Dr. Grumpy: "This is Dr. Grumpy." Dr. Noclue: "Hi, I'm the hospitalist tak...

Dr. Grumpy: "Are you and your brother fraternal or identical twins?" Mr. Gemini: "Ummm, we're the kind where we both have...

A new patient filled out our info sheet, with his address and phone number, then handed it back to Mary. Mr. Patient: "Can you copy th...

Let's keep this in mind: when using your driver's license to jimmy open a locked door, you SHOULD NOT leave it there afterwards. Lik...

Sometimes a company stops making a drug, or runs behind, or has a production stoppage for whatever reason. When this happens I typically get...

Mr. Nature: "I don't believe in medicines, so my cardiologist is treating me with supplements." Dr. Grumpy: "Which ones?...

I was on call this weekend, and during my appointed rounds I overheard the following quotes, which you won't normally hear outside a hos...

Yesterday we took the kids to Local Family Fun Place. As I watched them on a ride, two mid-teen girls went by, and I got to witness this: F...

Due to trouble waking up today, I simply present a pair of pictures. The first was sent by a reader who says he took this one of a store som...

Mr. Notochord: "I have all these tumors! Right there, on my back!" Dr. Grumpy: (examining patient): "Ummm, okay, where?"...

Look, if you're going to rob a convenience store, IT IS NOT recommended that you hand over a note with your name written on it. Especial...