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Tuesday, September 21, 2010
Now THAT'S ambitious!
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I'd like to thank my reader Miriam for submitting this. She noticed it in a hospital patient's (admitted for a knee problem) paperwork .
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A Blog detailing the insanity of my medical practice and the stupidity of everyday life.
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Welcome to my whining!
This blog is entirely for entertainment purposes. All posts about patients, or my everyday life, or anything else may be fictional, or be my experience, or were submitted by a reader, or any combination of the above. Factual statements may or may not be accurate. I could be making all this up. I may not even be a doctor. The only true statement on here is that I probably drink more Diet Coke than you do. A lot more.
Singing Foo!
Singing Foo!
Twitter fans- you can follow me @docgrumpy
Cast of Characters:
Annie: My Phenomenal MA
Mary: My Awesome Secretary
Ed: The office fish
Dr. Pissy: The guy I share an office with
Mrs. Grumpy: My Boss (also the world's greatest school nurse)
Frank, Craig, and Marie: The Grumpy Tribe
Garlic and Riley: The Grumpy Dogs
Questions? Comments? Biting sarcasm? Write to: pagingdrgrumpy [at] gmail [dot] com
Note: I do not answer medical questions. If you are having a medical issue, see your own doctor. For all you know I'm really a Mongolian yak herder and have no medical training at all except in issues regarding the care and feeding of Mongolian yaks.
Cast of Characters:
Annie: My Phenomenal MA
Mary: My Awesome Secretary
Ed: The office fish
Dr. Pissy: The guy I share an office with
Mrs. Grumpy: My Boss (also the world's greatest school nurse)
Frank, Craig, and Marie: The Grumpy Tribe
Garlic and Riley: The Grumpy Dogs
Questions? Comments? Biting sarcasm? Write to: pagingdrgrumpy [at] gmail [dot] com
Note: I do not answer medical questions. If you are having a medical issue, see your own doctor. For all you know I'm really a Mongolian yak herder and have no medical training at all except in issues regarding the care and feeding of Mongolian yaks.
Blog Archive
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2010
(742)
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September
(48)
- Dear Mr. Winkie,
- Yes, that's a very common disease
- Important safety measures
- Detective work
- Welcome to Grand Rounds, year 7!
- Homework
- More Medical Research
- September 27, 1854
- Attention crooks!
- No means no
- Sunday morning, 2:25 a.m.
- I still can't stand it.
- Tough case
- Doctors for Gooder English
- Gosh, I wonder what happened?
- Mary's Desk, September 22, 2010
- There's a lot of that going around
- Now THAT'S ambitious!
- And now for something completely different
- Urgent matters
- Dear Ambien-CR,
- Dead men tell no tales...
- Rolling on the River
- Skool Nerse Time
- Thursday evening, 6:18 p.m.
- Anatomy 101
- Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?
- E-prescribing idiocy
- Let's hope you aren't
- The joys of search engines
- Afternoon patient at Dr. Grumpy's
- Hmmm...
- Boob job
- Hygienic Horrors
- How about a cheeseburger for stroke awareness?
- This could mean a lot...
- Delay in game
- Annie's desk, September 8, 2010
- Things that make me grumpy
- Yes, I have kids
- Tuesday morning, 1:55 a.m.
- Tips from Dr. Grumpy
- NEW! Treats pain AND fatigue!
- Excuses
- Good answer
- Geography FAIL!
- Another one bites the dust
- History FAIL!
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September
(48)
18 comments:
It seems that often the nurses just make one up, without consulting the patient.
Happened to a family member of mine - was admitted to try to figure out what was going on. Nurses wrote a goal of "To go home' on the board, without ever mentioning it to us. ummm... no... Took a little doing to persuade them to change it to "Get a diagnosis".
In your case, depending upon what the patient's problem was (anorexia or GI problems), maybe being able to eat lunch might be a big goal.
Dr. G said it was for a knee problem. I know knees are pretty good at predicting weather, but foretelling when we will get to eat- oh wait - mine is telling me to get some lunch too!
Maybe they are, uhh, in too much pain to eat?
Or maybe they said "To eat lunch at this cafe in the park after a walk around the lake", but the nurse or whoever filling in the form got bored/ran out of space.
Other than that, I am out of ideas.
Pre-surgical? I know that if it's 1PM, and they told me I'd be in recovery by then, but I'm still waiting, eating lunch is a goal!
Is that patient a mother? As a mom of four ages 6 and under my goal of the day is frequently to eat whether it be breakfast, lunch or dinner. Perhaps this mom is hoping that while out for her appointment that she'll get to eat.
Now I'm off for some "me time" (AKA having a cavity filled at the dentist).
Listen, having recently undergone extensive shoulder surgery, my goal (daily) is to be able to put on deodorant... never mind dressing myself. Eating lunch is not far behind. ;)
Do I know where he/she is coming from!
On the one hand, I've been in situations where the nurse took everything I said literally. When I had my first kidney stone and was pacing and sweating and crying waiting (6 hrs total, from initial diagnosis!) for the IV team to come hook me up so I could get some pain relief, the intake nurse asked me what religion I was. I told her, "I belong to the Church of the Holy Wingnut. We worship the Wingnuts that hold the North and South Poles on The Globe." The next day someone came to ask me what exactly I'd meant.
On the other hand, what the 1st anonymous person says happens, too. The first time I did at-home IV antibiotics I told the 1st at-home nurse that I wanted to learn to do everything so I could quickly go back to work [while doing the IV stuff there, if needed]. (I had a PICC line, it wasn't like I needed a new needle in me all the time.) She wrote in my chart that I was "resistant to home health care" and a "problem patient". Fortunately the nurse that came the next day [after talking to me, said, "I'm so glad you want to do this yourself -- I wish I had more patients like you!" then read what the previous day person wrote in my chart and hit the roof! She encouraged me to report the 1st nurse, which I did.
Frankly, sometimes you get someone with their own agenda who doesn't listen to a word the patient says. I'm pretty sure this isn't restricted to health care!
Moose...ehhhh. I hate PICC lines! My son had one for for 3 weeks when he was 7...every 3 hours for 3 weeks he had to have his medication and each dose took an hour. What a horrible 3 weeks.
My husband once had staples put in his head after smacking it on a fireplace (don't ask, we were in our 20's and at a party..that explains a lot!), and when the staples were put in I asked the person who put them in if I could take them out with a staple remover. The guy thought I was serious. Some people just don't get my humor!
I can actually relate to this. After I had my knee surgery, eating lunch wasn't too bad, even with the CPM machine, but fixing my own lunch was surprisingly challenging. Getting all the fixin's together while on crutches and painkillers with eight kittens tearing around...lotsa food hit the floor, lol. Luckily, we had a case of those Drumstick icecream cones. I could manage those.
But for my goal, I wrote: "walking without falling down would be nice".
Moose, so true.
Maybe, it was waayyy past the nurse's lunch break?
Obviously spent a long time in intake.
On the other hand, you should have seen what he ordered at Burger King.
Re Kim's comment about the staple remover...
I used to have a very nice OBGYN who did not understand the dry sense of humor. When he delivered my 8 lb 13 oz daughter, my hubby asked him if he had checked for a twin. He didn't get it, just looked stunned. When my next baby went overdue, I wisecracked that if we didn't get on with the induction, it would take a can of axle-grease and a crowbar to get the baby out. He looked quite horrified for a minute there...
I'm the first anon. True, knees don't get hungry too often, I wasn't reading carefully there. Rest of it still goes though.
True story - older friend of mine had her gall bladder out. At her following uppt. the surgeon really did give us a staple remover, and told me I could take them out instead of bothering to drive all the way to him. haha, she was no fun, had her internist do it when we were visiting him - I was set to give it a go. Obviously not difficult (I know how to remove stitches/staples from animals) but I was still quite surprised.
When I went home from the hospital after my car wreck from hell (1986), they sent me with a staple remover and I took the remaining abdominal staples out. I discovered a decade later (via x-ray) that several staples remain, but they are internal. I don't set off the alarm at the airport with them- I wonder if I can still get an MRI? I don't happen to need an MRI, but one never knows when one might!
WV- conarse Is that where two butts are with each other? Or a convention of butts?
It's a noble goal, to eat lunch. All us pharmacists can relate!!
Details:
To eat hamburgers... with the next patient....at the doctors....after driving from the airport.
Deja (pre)vu?
verif: bomeres? Is that Spanish for *I'm outta here*??
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