Saturday, September 11, 2010
Hygienic Horrors
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It is a really scary, when catching up on the laundry, to realize that in the last 8 days your son has worn only 2 pairs of underwear.
A Blog detailing the insanity of my medical practice and the stupidity of everyday life.
Welcome to my whining!
This blog is entirely for entertainment purposes. All posts about patients, or my everyday life, or anything else may be fictional, or be my experience, or were submitted by a reader, or any combination of the above. Factual statements may or may not be accurate. I could be making all this up. I may not even be a doctor. The only true statement on here is that I probably drink more Diet Coke than you do. A lot more.
Singing Foo!
Singing Foo!
Twitter fans- you can follow me @docgrumpy
Cast of Characters:
Annie: My Phenomenal MA
Mary: My Awesome Secretary
Ed: The office fish
Dr. Pissy: The guy I share an office with
Mrs. Grumpy: My Boss (also the world's greatest school nurse)
Frank, Craig, and Marie: The Grumpy Tribe
Garlic and Riley: The Grumpy Dogs
Questions? Comments? Biting sarcasm? Write to: pagingdrgrumpy [at] gmail [dot] com
Note: I do not answer medical questions. If you are having a medical issue, see your own doctor. For all you know I'm really a Mongolian yak herder and have no medical training at all except in issues regarding the care and feeding of Mongolian yaks.
Cast of Characters:
Annie: My Phenomenal MA
Mary: My Awesome Secretary
Ed: The office fish
Dr. Pissy: The guy I share an office with
Mrs. Grumpy: My Boss (also the world's greatest school nurse)
Frank, Craig, and Marie: The Grumpy Tribe
Garlic and Riley: The Grumpy Dogs
Questions? Comments? Biting sarcasm? Write to: pagingdrgrumpy [at] gmail [dot] com
Note: I do not answer medical questions. If you are having a medical issue, see your own doctor. For all you know I'm really a Mongolian yak herder and have no medical training at all except in issues regarding the care and feeding of Mongolian yaks.
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2010
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September
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- Dear Mr. Winkie,
- Yes, that's a very common disease
- Important safety measures
- Detective work
- Welcome to Grand Rounds, year 7!
- Homework
- More Medical Research
- September 27, 1854
- Attention crooks!
- No means no
- Sunday morning, 2:25 a.m.
- I still can't stand it.
- Tough case
- Doctors for Gooder English
- Gosh, I wonder what happened?
- Mary's Desk, September 22, 2010
- There's a lot of that going around
- Now THAT'S ambitious!
- And now for something completely different
- Urgent matters
- Dear Ambien-CR,
- Dead men tell no tales...
- Rolling on the River
- Skool Nerse Time
- Thursday evening, 6:18 p.m.
- Anatomy 101
- Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?
- E-prescribing idiocy
- Let's hope you aren't
- The joys of search engines
- Afternoon patient at Dr. Grumpy's
- Hmmm...
- Boob job
- Hygienic Horrors
- How about a cheeseburger for stroke awareness?
- This could mean a lot...
- Delay in game
- Annie's desk, September 8, 2010
- Things that make me grumpy
- Yes, I have kids
- Tuesday morning, 1:55 a.m.
- Tips from Dr. Grumpy
- NEW! Treats pain AND fatigue!
- Excuses
- Good answer
- Geography FAIL!
- Another one bites the dust
- History FAIL!
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September
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39 comments:
I think you are right-that's pretty scary !~!
Yeah, if he was in an accident and hauled to the ER, the staff there might know you and figure out he's your kin.
Imagine the shame ;)
Bwahahahhaaaaahahaaa! Future frat boy right there.
He just could not find a good reason to change them.
At most, that's four days worth of underwear utilizing the turn-it-inside-out method.
Maybe he's been studying psychology, and felt that the underwear had to want to change?
Eight days out of two pair, if you use the inside out and the back to front methods.
Commando?
The dog ate the other pairs.
Like GunDiva, I wondered if he was using the turn-inside-out method.
Just wait 'til he thinks he should put clean ones on after his bath, and a new clean pair on in the morning when he gets dressed.
um...that is...when you kid decides he's actually GOING to wear underwear. Not that it's an issue in MY house or anything, just, er-, heard it from a *friend.*
Maybe at your house, instead of the sock fairy(or sock thieving gremilin) you have an underwear fairy?
He did the thing where you flip them inside out... so he's good :)
Don't worry... Soon teenage years will be upon you. He will shower six times a day and manage a complete change of clothes each time. Laundry hell will be upon you.
Disown him!
Dear Dr. and Mrs. Grumpy,
Having had some experience in this area, might I suggest you look under his pillow?
Sincerely,
Mrs. Village Idiot
Good luck with that.
Perhaps the the other six days he went commando?
It would be much worse if he was a girl. I'll admit I know very little of what a over-used pair of underwear worn by a boy look like, but by a girl it has the potential to kill all life on earth.
But only your son knew and was quite comfortable. You would have known if his decision forget clean underwear caused any problems. The boy would have been squirming in his seat. Try *looking* at the same clothing for days and days days! Bubba will change socks and underwear every day. (I have laundry to prove it.) But he will wear the same one pair of shorts for 3 straights weeks. Yep, I counted!
blah ....
I don't even know how the conversation came up but i made the statement that my 10 year old Tom Sawyer son took a bath every night. He said he didn't. Yes you do. No, I don't YES YOU DO! Well, he admitted, "I do get wet every night."
I just stumbled upon your blog today and find myself laughing at a lot of your posts.
Thank you for making my doctors seem human. Sometimes I forget that they don't have all the answers. I think a lot of people think that a doctor is a cure all and not just a practice.
very eco-friendly
But I bet he didn't mind a bit!
He must be one of those that doesn't change them till they have visible "skidmarks" in them lol Just wait till he is changing every time he uses the bathroom or whatever algorythm they use to change 20 times a day. With my daughter I told her (age 10) anything over 3 pairs a day and she was going to wash them herself or go "commando" and now at 16 I don't complain she changes clothes 6 times a day because she does her own laundry, so to me it is a win :)
Haha! I remember that my brother and I didn't like changing underwear - or any clothes - on winter mornings, since the fresh stuff was so cold on the skin at first! Putting the pieces on a heater helped.
I have a policy. I do not go into my kids' rooms, and I do not do their laundry.
Thus, while I have no doubt that they reach at least those heights of slovenliness, I can at least do the ostrich thing about it.
Me: Corwyn, take a shower.
Corwyn: Why?
Me: Because I told you to.
Corwyn: (30 seconds later) Done!
Me: Let me smell your hair
Corwyn back into shower
Me: Corwyn, take off the clothes you are wearing now, put them in the dirty clothes basket, and then put on pajamas.
Corwyn: Why?
Me: Because I want to make sure you have on clean clothes in the morning.
Me: Corwyn? Why are there only two pairs of underwear in this very large load of your clothing.
Corwyn: I dunno.
Me: Corwyn? You will put on a clean pair of underwear every morning.
Corwyn: Why?
Me: Because you want to live to graduate from high school.
The other day, I was putting my 4yr old's clothes away. There was a pair of leggings complete with undies crumpled up in her drawer. Thinking that maybe she put them on, changed her mind and threw them back in the drawer like that, I gave them the sniff test. That's the LAST time I try that...any question and they go in the hamper.
bwahahahhaaa. sounds just like my little brother. he used to hide his "favorite clothes" from my mom instead of throwing them in the wash, and would wear them until he looked like "pigpen" from peanuts.
Those undies should be able to walk on their own now.
Well, if they are not visibly dirty and resting against clean skin then what's the problem!
when pharmacy chick was dating Mr Chick ( 27 years ago), we were doing laundry together and while I had about 12 pairs of underwear, Mr C had about 3. We had a certain kind of dicussion about this disparity....and from that day forward the underpant count was 1:1...:-)
Turning them inside out seems a weird and novel approach. Would that not defeat the purpose of underwear, which is to prevent your outer clothes from getting stinky as quickly?
what about socks? how many pairs has he worn?
Hey, I know this tune! But I think I know only part of the verses, as I'm dealing with a girl.
Maybe they are composting somewhere.
Awesome.
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