Doctor Grumpy in the House

All right gang, time for the Grumpy family blow-out summer vacation. You're free of me for a few weeks. Have fun!

Nurse B writes: I work on a telemetry floor. As long as I've been there, they've had a board called "Look Who's Coming to...

Seen on a patient's info sheet: The first name listed above it was "Chris."

Dr. Grumpy: "All right, so the test Dr. Hand has asked me to do is called an EMG/NCV. It involves running some shocks through your arm,...

This was sent in from retired policeman Steve: Officer Steve: "Okay, Mr. Smith. We got your fingerprint results back. Not only is th...

"Hey, that's an improvement of almost one-half of 1 percent of a day you're getting back." Thank you, C!

Mary: "Okay, can I make a copy of your insurance card?" Mr. Card: "Here you go..." Mary: "Um... This is Sick Na...

Neurologists are a quirky bunch. We all have our own ways of checking various cognitive functions. We ask people to remember things, name pr...

Dr. Grumpy: "Well, looking over the hospital records, I'd have to agree that you had a seizure." Mr. Lingo: "I didn...

Ms. Vocab: "My Mom had breast cancer, so they did a vasectomy." Dr. Grumpy: "You mean mastectomy?" Ms. Vocab: "...

Gee, how'd I miss that one? I was sure it was "B." Thank you, SMOD!

Dr. Grumpy: "Looking at these reports, the MRI of your neck is normal. So is the CT scan, and the X-rays." Ms. Ichabod: "Th...

Mary: "Dr. Grumpy's office, this is Mary." Mrs. McDonald: "Hi, I'm on my way there for my appointment, but I'm ...

"Will the owner of a red fire truck parked in front of ER please move your vehicle?" Thank you, Marsha!