Dr. Grumpy: "Let me update your med list... Are you still taking Diazastatin 40mg a day?"
Mr: Hatt: "I'm taking Diazastatin 0.0014 ounces per day."
Dr. Grumpy: "It comes in milligrams. Do you happen to have the bottle?"
Mr. Hatt: "Nope, it's at home. You do the math if you want to know."
Dr Grumpy: "Okay... Are you still taking Smegosartan?"
Mr. Hatt: "Yes, do you want to know the ounces?"
Dr. Grumpy: "I..."
Mr. Hatt: "I'm sick of you people trying to cram the metric system down my throat. This is America."
Dr. Grumpy: "Sir, medicine, with a few rare exceptions, has always used milligrams for dosing. This isn't a political statement."
Mr. Hatt: "Well, now it's time for We The People to take our country back from your kind's bullshit. I'm doing my medications in ounces or not at all."
19 comments:
Sigh. When the inevitable happens, just think of it as evolution in action…
What about the Potrzebie System of Weights and Measures?
Too bad Mr. Hatt didn't take his ounce of prevention as regularly as he should have in the past, then you wouldn't need to pound him with the cure hammer
"We fought a revolution against Britain so that we could keep using British units!"
Well now the coroner will know to check for self over dose!
His coke dealer must love him.
"Come check out my 10cc cover band, 0.34 oz."
"Do you know anyone who wants to buy a used Cybertruck? I just realized that it's made by a company whose name is an SI unit."
"And if you want to take my temperature, it's going to have to be with a thermo39.37inches!"
"Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to listen some good old American country-rock, invented by 0.035oz Parsons."
"All the light went out in my world when Jack Daniel's switched from fifths to 750 ml bottles."
"The other day, some new guy showed up at my gun club meeting with a 9mm Glock. Let's just say he won't make that mistake again."
Tell him his blood pressure in inches of mercury and see if he stands by his standards.
I don’t see what the problem is many people self medicate from aluminum cans 12 ounces at a time, oh wait now I do see what the problem is
So how many grains to the dram, anyway?
Take back the country with what? While "caliber" is related to "inch" if you measure your bullet in inches you'll find it doesn't actually match the caliber. Thus what's he going to use, a sword? (Yeah, the metric ones don't match, either.)
"By which I mean snow leopards."
Keep that in mind when you order his blood tests.
Of course, there are standard US ounces, imperial ounces, and troy ounces...
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