Doctor Grumpy in the House

A Blog detailing the insanity of my medical practice and the stupidity of everyday life.

Monday, April 29, 2024

Waiting list

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Mary: "Dr. Grumpy's office, this is Mary." Ms. Frantic: "Hi! I really need to see a neurologist! All the ones at Massive ...
8 comments:
Sunday, April 14, 2024

Detective stories

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Did anyone else out there read "The Problem of Cell 13" by Jacques Futrelle? I'm assuming I'm not the only one, as it was ...
8 comments:
Monday, April 8, 2024

Inside Job

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A long time ago, when I was first starting out, I worked at a hospital that had only one MRI-compatible ventilator. For my non-medical reade...
7 comments:
Monday, April 1, 2024

Doctors behaving badly

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I'm with a patient when Mary wanders back. Mary: "Hey, Dr. Hypothec is on line two, he asked me to interrupt you." Dr. Grumpy:...
8 comments:
Monday, March 25, 2024

Seen in a chart

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12 comments:
Tuesday, March 19, 2024

Happy Springtime!

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(or Autumn, if you're on that side of the planet). My favorite ode to spring, courtesy of the great Tom Lehrer: Spring is here Spring is...
7 comments:
Monday, March 18, 2024

Semantics

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 "What do you mean the drug doesn't work? We can't write that! Find a better way to say it!"
5 comments:
Thursday, March 14, 2024

Happy Pi Day!

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In honor of Pi Day, AKA Einstein's birthday...   Hi, this is Craig Grumpy. A few years back, you may remember, I worked at Local Grocery...
9 comments:
Sunday, March 3, 2024

Sigh

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Look, calling my phone every 2 hours all weekend is NOT going to make your lab results come any faster.
4 comments:
Monday, February 26, 2024

You go, dude

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Dr. Grumpy: "This is Dr. Grumpy, returning a page." Dr. Hyper: "HI! THIS IS MIKE HYPER! I'M THE HOSPITALIST ON CALL OVER ...
7 comments:
Sunday, February 18, 2024

Sunday afternoon

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My current hospital consult is apparently unable to finish any sentence without putting the word "diarrhea" into it somewhere.
11 comments:
Friday, February 9, 2024

Quote of the day

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 "I have insomnia, but it's only a problem when I'm trying to sleep."
8 comments:
Monday, February 5, 2024

Seen in charts

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Here's some things you guys have sent in that somehow made it into medical records. Just remember folks, somewhere out there your doctor...
12 comments:
Monday, January 22, 2024

Random pictures

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 Okay, time to hit the mailbag for stuff you guys have sent in. First off, we have this label from a home sander: Next is this, from the ins...
6 comments:
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