Doctor Grumpy in the House

Mrs. Soma is well known to our call rotation. When Dr. Brain isn't on, she routinely tries to get a remarkable variety of pain relievers...

When Dr. Cortex is out of town, I cover his patients. I try to work within my patient's means as much as possible. If they have crappy (...

Dr. Grumpy: "Here are the names of 3 hand surgeons I recommend." Mr. Carpal: "Are they good docs? I don't want to see a b...

This note is from Local Physical Therapy, and hot off the fax just now. With therapists like this, who need enemies? (click to enlarge)

Getting ready for the day, and reading another doctor's note on a patient coming in this morning: "Her pain can involve 1 to 4 limb...

Mary: "Okay, I have you down for a follow-up appointment in 3 months, on March 22nd at 9:30." Mr. Organizer: "Let me write th...

Sometimes finding the humor is the best we can do. This morning I saw a new dementia patient, Mr. Bukubux. He's an older gentleman, who ...

A December phenomenon that drives me nuts. I'm sorry that your regular neurologist is closed/on vacation/dead until after New Years, and...

In the early 80's, when I was in high school, we had to take these career guidance tests. You answered a bunch of questions, and a compu...

LOOK! Just because you people waited until the END OF THE FREAKING YEAR to see if you met your insurance deductible, does NOT make it an eme...

I just wanted to write and thank you for the tray of homemade chocolate brownies that you brought my office last week. I'm well aware of...

I'd like to thank my reader Brian, who submitted this story. For my non-medical readers, NPO is medspeak meaning "no food, water, o...

Ya know, given the ease with which a guy was apparently able to walk on a plane with a bunch of explosives last week, some of the other meas...

Dr. Grumpy: "FRANK, CRAIG, MARIE GET IN HERE NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!! " (shifting feet, poor eye contact) Dr. Grumpy: "Why on Ea...