Monday, December 28, 2009

Dear Mrs. Thoughtthatcounts,

I just wanted to write and thank you for the tray of homemade chocolate brownies that you brought my office last week.

I'm well aware of your fondness for improvising new recipes, and the staff and I appreciate you telling us which brownies had jalapeƱos in them, which had bacon, and which had both.

As always, you've outdone yourself. Many of us here thought you'd never be able to top your 2007 tray of chili-pepper-and-white-chocolate-cookies, but we underestimated you and your fondness for spicy foods.

As you can imagine, your unique brownies didn't last long in our breakroom, and quickly disappeared.

You work so hard in the kitchen around the holidays, perhaps next year you should take a break and just rest. You've earned it.

Yours truly,

Ibee Grumpy, M.D.

26 comments:

  1. "quickly disappeared"?

    Does that mean they were eaten or thrown out? =D

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  2. This woman smokes a lot of weed. Or, is perpetually pregnant. Those are the only two reasons I can think of that convinces her these recipes are a good idea. Hey, maybe she's both. Wait, maybe she's Aztec. Has anyone asked her?

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  3. Anon- she's in her 70's. She's a sweet lady, with unusual desert tastes.

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  4. http://www.yumsugar.com/1599472

    http://homecooking.about.com/od/brownierecipes/r/blcookie71.htm

    The Jalapeno Brownies not as uncommon as you imagine. :) Similar to Aztec hot chocolate with chilli. http://coffeetea.about.com/od/chocolaterecipes/r/aztecchoc.htm

    The bacon brownies on the other hand... *goes green*

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  5. There is a lady that is constantly bringing us baked goods up to work that I never eat because, frankly, I think she's weird.

    I can just see her wiping her ass, and then rolling the cookie dough up with her bare hands.

    It's just not a chance I'm willing to take.

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  6. That reminds me of my friend's grandmother who made pinto bean pie. It was like refried beans mixed with sugar and coconut. Sometimes I think people should have to be licensed to cook!

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  7. I can't believe you are complaining about bacon brownies. For shame.

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  8. chilli and chocolate go together.
    even the lindt company thinks so.

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  9. Yes, I think you missed out on this one, Dr. Grumpy. I'd try them, for sure!!! But then, I do things like eat candied ginger straight up- yummmm-

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  10. She's been watching food network -- they've been doing a lot of "chacon," as my friend calls it: chocolate and bacon.

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  11. Any way you can get someone to call her and ask for the recipes for both of those?? I bet she wouldn't mind sharing the recipes! Seriously, I'd like to try them!! Post them here, huh? Pretty please? It'd make for a funny post, anyways! ;-)

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  12. I've suspected for a while you were my mother's neurologist. This just proves it....BTW - if she brings any ANYTHING with Ramen noodles, be very wary. She is still trying out the 1,001 uses for Ramen Noodle Soup.

    Yes - it is amazing I survived my childhood.

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  13. Once had a patient who was a known druggie who always baked us brownies and cake.

    The staff loved them, but I never touched the stuff. I was afraid he might have put something in there that might cloud my medical judgment.

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  14. Doesn't bacon make everything better? I dip french fries in ice cream...it totally works.

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  15. Ok, bacon and chocolate do go together, especially in baked goods! Nomnomnomnom! Chili's and chocolate go together as well, but I don't know about jalapeno...

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  16. The Mayans were all about mixing chilis and chocolate. I've tried a few of their recipes, and they are quite good.

    And bacon goes with everything.

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  17. Vosges Chocolate makes a fantastic chocolate bar that has bacon in it. And while I'm not a brownie fan, I do love bacon caramels!

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  18. She could have put Mag Citrate in them and had everyone's colon cleansed by New Years!

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  19. Yumm-sounds like winner combos to me!!

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  20. A tech that used to work with me cooked microwave bacon at 1 AM, and dumped her unwanted onions from Subway sandwiches in the trash next to where I worked. (I never understood why she ordered them only to throw them away until I heard the term passive-aggressive). On the night shift, bacon smelled like warm sweaty armpits, ugghh! as well as the Fritos consumed with broccoli floret casseroles. Needless to say, working the night shift was hard on my stomach.

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  21. Thanks a lot, Dr Grumpy. I had to use my last Zofran ODT thanks to this post!

    Chili and chocolate, okay...

    Bacon and brownies? Oy.

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  22. Hmm, her name isn't Letty Cropley by chance is it?

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Vicar_of_Dibley#Characters

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  23. Oh my god! Pinto bean pie is the best freaking pie ever! Your friend's grandmother must have gotten the Cortez, Colorado Pinto Bean Recipe Contest Cookbook that my mom has. That pie won a blue ribbon! We traditionally have it in December.

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  24. It can't be any worse than my BIL who use to put Italian salad dressing and hot fudge sauce on pancakes.

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  25. It's generally a good rule of thumb not to touch any homemade treats in the break room unless you know exactly who brought it in. While I appreciate the generous thought and effort, I won't be eating anything from the kitchens of my patients who are chain smokers, have poor personal hygiene, suffer from dementia, or are holding a grudge because I declined to fill their narcotic/benzo/soma prescripion early.

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  26. KC_the_professional_pt.January 2, 2010 at 3:54 AM

    As I am a kindly sort of person & suffer with all sorts of medical drama stemming from autoimmune disease, I take heart for the poor docklings (residents) & nurses at my local medical hoosegow & make all sorts of goodies, not just at Christmas, but year round & have yet to get a negative response from those who eat what I'd made. (Perhaps they are reassured by my address label affixed to the plastic covering?) I know that not everyone can be trusted to provide you with edible gifts, but some replies here just seem waaaaay too snobby & I wish to point out that the chances of being poisoned or being fed adulterated food is extremely rare from a patient or "stranger" but a more popular scheme used by a spouse or family member. Albeit I am far from being "glamorous" & do not own a kitchen fit for publication in Country Homes & other medical office periodicals, I don't smoke while preparing food, nor in my kitchen EVER, always cook with my hair tied back & if I "need to knead" dough or other ingredients, I will wear gloves (it not only keeps the ingredients clean, but keeps my hands from smelling or being stained.) I hope my impression is wrong on those who struck a chord in me with their replies & if I am right, golly: I hope they get a nice pus-infused phlegm ball in their $45 organic, hand massaged Bibb lettuce salads (with just a splash of Balsamic vinegar & HOLD THE OIL!!!) to set things right.
    As for the more bizarro recipes used to make treats, such as those delivered to Dr. Grumpy & staff, I always wondered why people would make these sorts of things rather than the nominal shortbread, chocolate chip cookies & brownies, but perhaps it has to do with some patients being "guinea pigs" for medicines & treatments figuring they'd reciprocate by having you & other docs trying out the lime juice & lavender butter cookies & other odd concoctions...

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So wadda you think?