Dr. Grumpy: "Have a seat, what can I do for you?"
Mrs. Anatidae: "My homeopath says his exam showed I have taurine in my brain, and referred me to you to take it out."
Pause
Dr. Grumpy: "Ma'am, everyone has taurine in their brain. It's critical for nerve function. It's in most organ systems."
Pause
Mrs. Anatidae: "So... you're telling me there isn't a surgery or something to take it out? He said there was."
Dr. Grumpy: "No. It's normal to have taurine in your brain. You need it to stay alive."
Pause
Mrs. Anatidae: "I'm sick of all the lies you regular doctors tell people like me to keep us sick so you can make money off our suffering!!!"
She stormed out and slammed the door.
I don't know what you did to piss off that homeopath, but it must have been pretty bad.
ReplyDeleteDid somebody say "Make money off suffering?"
ReplyDeleteOK folks - you have to follow the link to the homeopath video.
ReplyDeleteBut, Set down that coffee first.
Remove the brain leave the Taurine. Real story , upon getting the duty to inform family of relatives lack of brain activity with care nurse, and deliver the pull the plug spell. Was asked by family members to arrange a brain transplant for the patient. My friend said she physically had to shove the care nurse out of the room as she was beginning paroxysms of giggles. So to spare the family of a hysterical nurse. She shoved her out .Sat them down to slowly deliver the news that medical technology’s had not yet achieved that level
ReplyDelete‘Dr’ Oz on Foxys ? /s
ReplyDeleteIn the UK The facts of Homeopathy was incorporated by Act of Parliament in 1950 and has the heir to the Crown, the prince ofWales a sa patron. An opportunity to to hive them off from conventional medical practice once and for all was lost when “revalidation” for docs registered with the General Medical Council was introduced a few years ago. (The GMC licences doctors to practice medicine in the UK). The GMC recognised the Faculty of Homeopathy as an organisation that can validate medically qualified homeopaths for medical practice. No doubt they had an eye to the not too far distant future when the patron of the Faculty of Homeopathy becomes king/head of state….
ReplyDeleteThe only positive things that can be said about homeopathy is that it is cheap. With the exception of the unfortunate children who do not get vaccinated because of the homeopathic views of their parents, unfortunately homeopathy cannot be said to produce evolution in action. By the time homeopathic treatment for an otherwise treatable fatal disease has carried the adherent off, they will already have reproduced.
And the fact that you're declining to perform a procedure that you could charge for just means that you're playing the long game.
ReplyDelete"One Red Bull and vodka, hold the Red Bull."
ReplyDeleteShow her a picture of a scalpel and tell her that you just performed homeopathic surgery. Then send her a big bill and hope that she doesn't pay you with homeopathic money.
ReplyDeleteHilarious. Especially like "Anonymous's" comment. I used to clean house for a woman who was a devotee of "flower remedies" and had a huge collection of little bottles of homeopathic elixirs/tablets and and a lovely chart on the wall explaining what to use for what problem. She had a number of health issues and I couldn't see that any of it did her any good at all.
ReplyDeleteYears ago my PCP was no longer my PCP, and I mentioned to someone who evidently didn't know me very well, and they recommended someone who specialized in natural medicine. I thought that meant that I would not hear about bogus fads and would suggest exercise if it was warranted, not cosmetic surgeries or drugs for what could be relieved with rest, relaxation, proper sleep hygiene and nutritional balance. What was my first clue? Looking over the reading matter in the waiting room advertising chelation therapy ... and, it only got weirder from there. A person comes out of a good pharmacy school with a sound understanding of what looks like a duck, swims like a duck, also usually quacks.
ReplyDeleteSo what do homeopaths think is wrong with taurine in the brain???
ReplyDeleteInsane in the membrane!
ReplyDeleteTaurine in the brain!
Sorry Cypress Hill
Quaaaaaack.
ReplyDelete